When it’s time to move on, we move on.
I am in the midst of taking a very big step in my life – I quit my current job.
While I don’t want to dwell on the reasons why, it is just something that I have to do. Well, let’s call a spade a spade. Over the last 2 months I have been carrying two pieces of paper with 28 reasons to quit and 11 reasons to stay on this job. The pros thumped the cons. Plus sembahyang istikharah and doa banyak2 minta petunjuk etc. etc. etc.
Two days from now, on 7 May 2011 will be my 21st anniversary with this company. While it has been fun, worthwhile and insane at times, it’s time to move.
Lina gave me her blessings, in her own words, “You do not seemed happy in this job anymore, not like before”.
I might have told her a thing or two about my current job but I never really brought any real worries home from the office. I never worry her needlessly. Let me carry some of the burden alone. To which she replied, “You do not have to, I can see it in your face. Remember, we have been married for more than 20 years, I know… why don’t you just move on…...”.
So there. A potpourri of feelings, a mixed bag of emotions and the corresponding highs and lows. Well, I do have that 2.8 acres of land that I could work on. I heard cili api, serai and papayas can pick good prices nowadays. I reckon an acre of cili api, an acre of serai and half an acre of papayas would be enough to pay for electricity, water, phone, the internet and a small car……. I have my EPF, we have our little bit of savings, the other pieces of land that I bought, I could cash in the insurances that I have been ploughing money into all these years and God knows it’s time they do their bit for us and maybe work as a security guard for a few additional bucks….. or jaga workshop or store somebody else punya.
It was a hard decision to make but once I made that decision, it’s not unlike the skies cleared up after a heavy thunderstorm. The calmness is surreal sometimes. But with the corresponding anxiety and apprehension at times. Apa apalah, as a friend used to say. Ah well, what will be will be.
But then, rezeki ada di mana mana, insya Allah.
I need a new drug.