Dudae Simboyo

Cinta

2012-01-03T19:03:00.008+08:00

Nazzim keeping Cinta occupied.
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I have found Cinta. Yes, Cinta. Not cinta as in jatuh cinta but Cinta the person.

Cinta is my eldest sister's granddaughter. Her full name is Cinta Reana. She will be 7 years old this year but last week was the first time I met her. I still remember the days when I would send her father to school, when he was only a few years older than her. She loves to sing, especially the song "Itsy Bitsy Teeny Weeny Yellow Polka Dot Bikini".

On one of the nights when all of us just sat down talking to each other, Cinta was sitting on my lap, I told her,

"Your Papa used to sit on my lap just like what you are doing now..........."

Her Papa, my nephew, smiled as she creased her brow, stretching her comprehension, as she tried to imagine her Papa sitting on my lap.

She calls me "Andong -----". I like it. We used to call our maternal grandfather that. So my sister is Andong Ibu, my brother-in-law is Andong Ayah etc. etc. etc.

Yes, I found Cinta... No drug in the world could replace that.

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Dr. Jane

2011-09-26T13:03:00.002+08:00

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A few weeks ago I was in that small city state south of our country on a business trip. I stayed at a nice hotel and we have our meals at a small lounge on the 31st floor of the hotel.

The first time I went to the lounge was for breakfast the day after I arrived.

“Good morning Dr Jane, how are you this morning?, the head waiter greeted me.

He got me mixed up with my boss – Jane is a pelat version of my boss’ Malay name. I thought I’d leave it at that, he’ll figure it out himself later. So for breakfast that day, it was Dr. Jane, Dr. Jane. Dr. Jane, Dr. Jane.

“Would you like a cup of coffee Dr. Jane?” “How was breakfast Dr. Jane?” “Will you be here long, Dr. jane?” And so on………….

The next day, it was the same – Dr. Jane, Dr. Jane. Dr. Jane, Dr. Jane……..

“Uh, I am not Dr. Jane, Dr. Jane is my colleague, he’ll be down in a few minutes, I’m…….”

Before I could say my name he said, “Oh, I’m solly Mr. H…..”, well, at least he knew my name….

So that was that, it was fun being a Dr. for a day but I’m not a PhD holder so I’ll stay with being a Mister thank you.

Dr. Jane, Dr. Jane…………….

I need a new drug…….

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Poor Jack

2011-05-19T15:38:00.005+08:00

Jack in his manja pose, with bandaged leg and all....

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About a month ago, Jack came home limping and with a bloodied rear right leg, making Lina thought that he had been in a fight. She took him to the vet and the vet said that most likely he had been run over by a vehicle. The vet shaved the fur on his right rear leg and it was a mess. There were real concerns that he would lose that leg. The vet told us to go to the animal hospital in UPM in Serdang. It was already late so Lina had to wait till the next day and took Jack home.

Since he was unwell, we let him sleep in Sofia's room. The first night at home, he attacked his bandaged leg and he bit and scratched Sofia. Imagine Sofia calling me at 4 am, crying and saying something about Jack going crazy.

Dr. Nurul at the animal hospital at Serdang was a big help. I was impressed on how she and her assistant handled Jack, claws, teeth and all. Yes, Jack was badly hurt. We had to leave Jack for a few days there. The house was not the same without him.

Three days later, he came home. We, with Lina leading, we had to change his bandages every day. Make him eat his medications every day. You should see him with his head turned all the way to the back, trying to avoid eating his pills.

He's much better now. He's still limping but he's still King of the house.

Well people, go to that animal hospital in UPM Serdang. Those people know what they are doing and thank you Dr. Nurul, Dr. Tan and all you people there.

Hutang

2011-05-11T11:06:00.003+08:00

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Hutang.

Bila pinjam duit, bayar balik. Tu aje. It is not rocket science, it is not nuclear physics, it is just common sense. Tak dapat bayar semua sekali, bayar sikit-sikit. Bak kata orang-orang tua, lama lama jadi bukit...... Senang aje. Masa pinjam tu janji nak bayar kan? So, tunaikan janji.....

With the intentions of borrowing money, promises were made. Oooppssss, I forget (yes, I forgggeeeettttt), promises are made to be broken. Hahahahahahahahaha......... Of course, masa meminta, bulan depan bayar. Minggu depan even. Dalam masa dua hari pun ada. Tapi bila dah dapat duit, hampeh. Yang bagi pinjam nak sebut pun takut, takut nanti di kata mengungkit. Hahahahahaha......... mengungkit? Atau bagi pinjam sikit dah bising. Sikit ke empat ribu tu? Sikit ke lima ribu tu? Empat ringgit mungkin sikit. Tiga puluh lima sen tu sikit.

Yang bagi pinjam jadi pesalah. Masa meminta, datang selalu rumah. Talipon selalu. Cintalah katakan...... Memang macam bercinta, nak something kan? Orang bercinta tu nak kawin lah........ ni nak duit. Hahahahahaha....... Bila dah dapat, usahkan tak datang, call pun tak jawab. Hantar SMS? Sorry lah brader, tak kan jawab.

Anyway, just a reality of life.

Unpaid debts. Neither a lender nor a borrower be...........

Uh oh, do I owe anyone any money?

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Moving On.........

2011-05-05T17:12:00.001+08:00

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When it’s time to move on, we move on.

I am in the midst of taking a very big step in my life – I quit my current job.

While I don’t want to dwell on the reasons why, it is just something that I have to do. Well, let’s call a spade a spade. Over the last 2 months I have been carrying two pieces of paper with 28 reasons to quit and 11 reasons to stay on this job. The pros thumped the cons. Plus sembahyang istikharah and doa banyak2 minta petunjuk etc. etc. etc.

Two days from now, on 7 May 2011 will be my 21st anniversary with this company. While it has been fun, worthwhile and insane at times, it’s time to move.

Lina gave me her blessings, in her own words, “You do not seemed happy in this job anymore, not like before”.

I might have told her a thing or two about my current job but I never really brought any real worries home from the office. I never worry her needlessly. Let me carry some of the burden alone. To which she replied, “You do not have to, I can see it in your face. Remember, we have been married for more than 20 years, I know… why don’t you just move on…...”.

So there. A potpourri of feelings, a mixed bag of emotions and the corresponding highs and lows. Well, I do have that 2.8 acres of land that I could work on. I heard cili api, serai and papayas can pick good prices nowadays. I reckon an acre of cili api, an acre of serai and half an acre of papayas would be enough to pay for electricity, water, phone, the internet and a small car……. I have my EPF, we have our little bit of savings, the other pieces of land that I bought, I could cash in the insurances that I have been ploughing money into all these years and God knows it’s time they do their bit for us and maybe work as a security guard for a few additional bucks….. or jaga workshop or store somebody else punya.

It was a hard decision to make but once I made that decision, it’s not unlike the skies cleared up after a heavy thunderstorm. The calmness is surreal sometimes. But with the corresponding anxiety and apprehension at times. Apa apalah, as a friend used to say. Ah well, what will be will be.

But then, rezeki ada di mana mana, insya Allah.

I need a new drug.

Definitely.

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Bob

2011-02-22T22:25:00.005+08:00

Bob.

I wonder what happened to him.

One of the coolest and paling tak kisah manusia in the whole world...

Maybe I ought to go to 'ganu and look for him.

Soei Lorrr....

2010-12-03T12:14:00.003+08:00

Yesterday was a bad day for me. Went to one of these fancy cafes, where they serve 8-ringgit cups of coffees and I ordered mee jawa for lunch and after waiting for 40 minutes, but no mee jawa, I asked for the bill and guess what, the bill came with the mee jawa. That was enough to make anyone blow his top. So I asked them, nicely, to keep their mee jawa and I'll keep my money. That meant a quick trip down to the fast food joint downstairs....

Then at night, went out for supper for Sofia and while Sofia's maggi goreng arrived quite on time, my tosei only arrived as I was lining up to pay for what we have eaten. Now I remember why I stopped going to that mamak shop a few months ago - their service was lousy. You'd wave at them, call them, they'd look at you and pretend that they did not see you calling. Ah well, just exercising my teeny weeny consumer rights.

I need a new drug...

In the meantime, enjoy watching Jack laze the days away above....

My New Toy

2010-11-11T13:58:00.003+08:00

The photo above is my new toy. It's a Suzuki 1250S Bandit. Should be out next week. Been nearly a quarter of a century since I last had a big bike. Back then it was a Suzuki 500cc, the two-cylinder bike that was the same model used by our police. Before that it was a BSA 250cc, a single cylinder, fire breathing exhaust bike.

My other toy, the Hilux is still around and I am still enjoying using it.

Trust me, I got it at a steal. My criteria was a 4-cylinder, at least 750cc, street bike. And what I got was more than what I could wish for. I had to get a helmet and a pair of riding gloves and I'm ready. Now to wait for the bike.

Call it mid-life crisis, age or whatever but I got my new toy.

See ya....

Jack

2010-08-08T00:24:00.007+08:00

This is the latest addition to our family – Jack. Or his full name is Jack Nyian. Sofia said that it’s how the Japanese says meow. It’s good enough by me.

When Jack joined us in February, he was about two and a half months old. A baby still. He didn’t eat for two weeks – the only reason we could think of was that he misses his siblings, there were four of them altogether at the SPCA. We had to force feed him, his medicines and his food. He’d protest, sounding like a faulty chainsaw every time we fed him. We tried all sorts of cat food, right up to ones that have a crown on the labels – for royalty we reckon, very exclusive. It didn’t work. After about 3 weeks and a scrawnier and scrawnier Jack by the day, we found a brand that he’d gobble up readily. But it came at a cost – part of his fur would disappear as the days went by. The vet later told us that it was because of the salt in the food – salt and cat fur do not go down well with each other it seems. So we took him off that particular brand of food and pleasantly found out that by then he’d eat whatever brand of dry cat food we’d give him.

At night when we bring him into the house, he’d disappear for about half an hour or so before appearing with a very favorite play thing – cockroach!! Eeewww Jack. We still keep him in the cage outside at nights, there are dogs outside that makes it too dangerous to let him roam free. We’d let him loose in the daytime because he’d come home after an hour or so. But at night, the few times he “escaped”, it was after a long session of searching and shouting his name that he’d appear, usually all dirty and panting. Sofia’s eyes would be moist already, at the prospect of Jack not returning for the night. Once he came back with a cut on his left thigh. We thought he was in a fight but he was relatively clean, he wasn’t panting or scared and I reckoned that he cut himself on a thorn or something sharp.

He hardly meows. He’d meow when he wants to get out from the cage in the morning. He’d meow mostly to Sofia only. If he’s out on a walkabout, Sofia calling out his name would usually bring him home. It usually does not work with Lina or me. Sofia playing the piano would have the same effect too. I tried but I guess my very bad rendition of Crocodile Rock would only drive him further away. He’d come in the door and announce himself home with a very soft meow and lie down to have his pink, yes, pink tummy scratched. We don’t worry too much about him anymore if he were to run off in the daytime, because he’d always come back after a while.

Though physically he is fully grown but he is still a kitten and there are some square faced tomcats out there, within the neigbourhood and I think Jack would still have some trouble handling them. But I reckon by the end of this year, he’d be able t hold his own against most of them. He’d purr loudly whenever we carry or stroke him and every few days or so, we’d say he “bau macam kucing” and it’s mandi time for Jack. No major problems except that he’d just show his unhappiness at the shampooing and water by trying to escape and at being towelled dry. Amidst declarations that he smells, looks and feels much better, he’d sit down for the next half an hour and lick himself dry.

Well, al least tak bau macam kucing lagi.....

Awan Yang Biru

2010-06-18T09:00:00.004+08:00

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Cerita ni terjadi lama dulu. A long time ago. Kalau dalam Star Wars tu, a long time ago in a galaxy far far away tapi ni dekat je, kat Lembah Kelang. Long time ago tu memang long time ago lah.

Masa tu baru lepas periksa paling besar dalam hidup kita semua. I am sure all of us know which examination I am talking about. So, aku pun lepak rumah relative seorang ni, tak payah bagi tau relationship detail lah, cukup setakat tu. Panggil sedara aku sorang ni Abang lah, OK. Adalah 2 minggu lepak rumah dia. Masa tu dia dah ada teman. OKlah, girlfriend lah tu, special punya. Buah hati dia lah tu. Intan payung, gunung meletup, semualah tu…. Kita panggil buah hati dia tu Kakak lah, sebab Kakak ni ada adik seorang, yang kita akan panggil Adik. So Abang dan Kakak ni of couse memang lah selalu nak duduk dua-duaan jauh sikit dari orang lain. Kalau kat umah, dia orang kat hujung sana and my task is to keep the Adik away so that those two love birds can cakap2lah all the lovey dovey things that love birds chirp to one another. Gasaklah dia orang, people in love kan, tau aje lah.

And si Adik ni punya favorite words were, “Mana kakak?”

At which I would say, “Jangan kacau Kakak, meh kita beli aiskerim” or “Jangan kacau Kakak, meh kita main badminton.”

“Kakak mana?”

“Tu Kakak kat swing tu dengan Abang, jangan kacau dia orang….”

And we’d proceed to eat our ice creams or play badminton.

During one weekend, Kakak’s (and Adik’s) family decided to go to the beach. So they asked Abang to go along, Abang asked me and I refused but Kakak begged me to go (sebab, if I don’t go, then Abang will not go) and being the prihatin punye sedara, I agreed. So I think all of us, like ten of us slept in one chalet. OK je for me, roughing it out on the carpet. We just enjoyed walking along the beach, played billiards and swam in the ocean.

Sampai babak swimming ni pulak, mak datuk, both Kakak and Adik pakai bikini, two-piece pulak tu!!! Wei, I just turned 17 (hormones!!!), Kakak was 17 too, Adik was 13. Macam biasa, aku kena melayan si Adik. Si adik pakai bikini. Yang si Adik ni asyik nak mencari si Kakak aje. Si kakak pun pakai bikini. Aduh, satu hal pulak dah.

“Kakak mana?”

"Eh, jangan kacau Kakak, biar dia sama Abang tu jalan-jalan borak2, berenang2 sana. Kita main2 kat sini, air cetek. Adik tak tau berenang.”

“Mana Kakak?”

“Meh, kita cari ais kerim….”

Ais kerim lagi…………… Manalah aku pernah berdamping dengan budak perempuan pakai bikini dalam hidup aku!! So, sebagai seorang budak lelaki yang berwibawa, puaslah aku usahakan supaya tak terpandang Kakak dan Adik in their bikinis, puaslah aku pandang atas, ke langit. Kalau tak ke langit pun, pandang atas lah. It worked. Sumpah, sampai hari ni aku tak tau apa warna bikini dia orang pakai, scout’s honour….. Masa tu, aku baru realize betapa biru dan cantiknya langit tu dan betapa creativenya nature yang membentuk awan dalam berbagai-bagai bentuk. Burung, ikan, gajah, daun keladi, cawan kopi, bikini…..

Bikini?

Oh my Zod......

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Cincin Spock

2010-06-12T21:30:00.003+08:00

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A few guys at their overseas location were talking about what cars they will buy when they get back home......

Noding kate, "Aku nak beli mato belalae...."

Rahman kate, "Aku nak beli mato kacae...."

Seli pulok, "Aku nak beli mato bulak....."

Noding tamboh, "Pah tu mato biru pulok....., ha ha ha ha...."

Kereta apa mato biru tuh...... Datang seorang lagi kawan mereka, Wan.....

"Wae, mu nok beli kerheto apo Wae........!!!!!"

"Oooooh, aku nak tuka spok ring.......!"

"Oh, mu Wae, mu nok bawo duik mati ko....!!! Apo mu Wae!!!!"

"Anak aku sorang ambik electrical trade, sorang ambik electronic trade - aku nak beli rumoh kedai untuk dia orang buat base buat business. Beli mechedis ke, bi-eng ke, empak ratuh rhibu lepas lima tahung jadi seratuh lima puloh rhibu. beli rumoh kedai untuk dia orang, lepah lima tahung, jadi lima ratuh rhibu....... Baik aku beli rumoh kedai...."

"Oooohh mu Wae, mu ni, kedekuk!!!!!"

Suke hati mu Wae, whakever makes you happy....

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When Good Byes Are Forever

2010-05-21T23:14:00.005+08:00

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Just over a hundred days ago, a very good friend to me and many others, Harris Mohamed, passed away.

Harris was a fiercely independent person. If we ever need to know a person with a mind of his own, he is one of them. Rules are for the faint-hearted, not for him. Many of us were not close to him during our time in school but we became closer after we left. It was just like each other was the only link left to that period a long time ago.

I kinda miss him. If you want an honest opinion, go ask him. If he pisses anyone around him, then he pisses anyone around him. He'll say what he meant, don't expect any sugar coatings or honey wraps around the words.

All of our common friends have have known him since we were 12 years old. He doted on his family, his sister, his brothers, his nephews and nieces.

The last time we saw him was two weeks before he left us. We never thought he would not be around 2 weeks later. We never thought we'd never hear his infectious laughter again, his harsh critiques will never linger in our heads again, his honest compliments will never ring in our ears again. We were rudely made aware of our mortality.

Somehow, only W H Auden's poem seemed appropriate for this moment........

Stop all the clocks, cut off the telephone,
Prevent the dog from barking with a juicy bone,
Silence the pianos and with muffled drum
Bring out the coffin, let the mourners come.

Let aeroplanes circle moaning overhead
Scribbling on the sky the message He Is Dead,
Put crepe bows round the white necks of the public doves,
Let the traffic policemen wear black cotton gloves.

He was my North, my South, my East and West,
My working week and my Sunday rest,
My noon, my midnight, my talk, my song;
I thought that love would last for ever: I was wrong.

The stars are not wanted now: put out every one;
Pack up the moon and dismantle the sun;
Pour away the ocean and sweep up the wood.
For nothing now can ever come to any good.

It was like we took our friends for granted. We never thought that one would be taken away from us so quickly. In the blink of an eye. He was just a friend to many, he never needed to be more than that. Now all that is left is the memory of a friend. The real person is gone forever. There is still many of us left, but all of many could never make up for the loss of one. Not him, not the ones before him.

Semuga Allah mencucuri rahmatnya keatas hamba-hambanya, Azland Adnan, Rose Azimah Abdul Aziz, Maulud Hashim dan Harris Mohamed......

Amin.

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Kepoi

2010-04-20T22:20:00.004+08:00

Kepoi, squatting extreme right... My left arm is visible at the left of the picture.

I just came back from JB a few hours ago, had something to do there at that university down south.

It was a good trip, one reason being, I managed to meet a very dear old friend of mine - Kepoi. Don't ask me how his nice real name became that, one of those things a long time ago..... But it started with Clairol and went downhill after that......

Now Kepoi and me were part of the quintet - the others being Ding, Che Man and Gigi - in that one-eyed rugby team a long time ago. Kepoi came from that school in Jenan, while Ding, Che Man and Gigi came from that school in Ipoh and of course your truly from that school in KL, all powerhouses in that game, though Ding, Che Man and Gigi outnumber us every time we got into the argument about which school is the best. Once in a while we'd catch one of them alone and we'd - Kepoi and me - get our pound of flesh. He was the flanker, Che Man scrum half, Gigi standoff, Ding inside centre and I'd be the outside centre. In the inter-faculty games, I'd play with CheMan against Ding and Gigi and Kepoi would be all alone in the land survey team. Of course it goes without saying, the land survey team would be sayur.....

The last time I saw Kepoi was in 1986, yes, 24 years ago when I went to JB for a job interview, right after returning home. Now, being jobless then, money was a bit tight, so when it was time for me to go back, I had just enough money for the bus fare and maybe a few ringgits more, but not much. So I asked him to loan me RM 10, for any contingencies on my way home.

We compared notes - mainly on the kids and life nowadays, so long after those days when we were young. I had to leave after a short while as I had a 3-hour drive back home and with work tomorrow staring at me.

"Poi, jangan tunggu 24 tahun lagi ye?"

And I paid him back the RM 10. We had a good laugh. What are friends for. Laughs, for sure.

Commencement (Oooohh.....A Long Time Ago)

2010-04-14T22:21:00.004+08:00

I think I am slightly to the left of the faculty member in the red robe, fixing my cap....

I decided to participate in the Commencement exercise in my senior year on the morning of the day itself. You could do that over there. Initially the thought was, tak rugged lah, commencement commencement ni..... Rugged mak-ged, gi jugak....

It was a mad dash with Mardzukie to the student union to grab a robe and a cap. And also to register. It's not complicated over there - I was in a Levis' 501, a white shirt and a pair of Converse high tops.

I think Mardzukie still have the robe and the cap - he was supposed to keep it while I go home for good and until I get a copy of my degree from the school, just in case they figured out I pinched the robe and cap and they wanted it back. Mardzukie could then give it back to the school and they would give me my degree. It turned out that Mardzukie misplaced the robe and cap somewhere in his postings in the army but fortunately the school forgot about it too.

I need my robe and cap....

Pseudo Lina

2010-04-05T23:12:00.004+08:00

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A few months ago when we visited Nazzim at his school, I met two ex-schoolmates. So naturally I introduced them to Lina. Somehow I got the notion that something was not right, they were too rigid, for the lack of a better word. But I really thought nothing of it then.

A few minutes later I heard someone calling out my name - slowly.

"Psssttt Eh H, tu your wife ke? Lain lah.", one of them piped out.

"Yalah, I thought so to....." said the other one.

"You gals have met her kan, over at my house dulu?"

"Ya lah, that's why, that's why I said she looked different, that's why I wasn't so sure....."

"Ya lah..."

"Wei, mana adalah, tu sorang aje lah, mana ada I arak orang lain dengan I, tulah wife I sorang...."

"Lain lah...."

"Ya lah, lain lah..."

"Dah, jangan macam-macam, mana ade..........."

No, I have been married to only one person - that's Lina.

No, I have not been entertaining any notions of having more.

No, I have not thought of it.

I might need a new drug but nothing else.

Ha!!!

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Running Bull

2010-03-18T23:51:00.003+08:00

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I have started jogging, well more like brisk walk mostly, around the KLCC Park a few times a week over the last 2 or 3 months. One lap around that place is about 1.3 km and I try to do at least 3 laps and once in a while I'd manage to sneak in that extra lap.

I'd walk briskly most of the time and break into a slow jog after a lap or so and happiness is being able to jog non-stop for at least one lap and delirium is when I managed to jog 2 laps non-stop. So far I have managed delirious once, once, once.

Bad news is during the performance appraisal cycle recently where I could not even squeeze a session in 2 weeks!!! I'm back to square one this week. After each run, my feet hurts, my ankles hurt, my thighs hurt but it is still possible to feel good. I'm doing about 14 minutes a lap if I am walking and when I jog, I'd manage to whittle it down to about 10 or 11 minutes and it is my fervent wish to break the 10-minute barrier. Help me please, Dr. Bannister......

I kinda hate, well, not hate, more like envy, those who would breeze past me like they are on steroids and I keep telling myself, one day, one day, one day I will do that, and run four laps non-stop!!! Most are thin bordering on anorexic but some are pretty normal. Some move in a funny way, some are your normal run of the mill runners and some are just show offs, boooooooooooooooooooooo.............. You just wait, you show offs. There are some cute ones too. I swear they are not the reasons I jog, scout's honour. I wonder if I am funny, normal or show off, no, defintely not a show off.

I thought of joining a gym but let me run first and we think about being Mr. Wonderful later on.

Ugh, I need a new drug...

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Down Memory Lane X

2010-01-13T23:18:00.007+08:00

There is Amir Panjang. Rakhim Joko, Meor Moyok, Unta Kassim, Red, Shamsul, George and Rostam in this photo. And of course, the referee is our Modern Maths teacher, Gordon.

Both teams. In addition to the ones I have mentioned above, there is also Baby, Tancik, Penyu, Chang, Riduan, Jompol, Salim Pot, Sahbudin, Unta Kadir, Hasbullah, Salim Mohd and Ngocheng.

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Right after our exams in Form Three (whoa, that was a long time ago!), the rugby team from That school in Kuala Kangsar came avisiting. We had fun making fun (oops) of their wooden bus. We had a nice bus made of metal then, ha ha.... Both Rostam and Red had brothers in that school. A posse of Lina's uncles and cousins went to that school. My brother-in-law went to that school. Later when I went to college, I met many more who did. At work, more of them. Ah well.....

But we won that game, though a friend from That school, from that year, insisted that they won. Not so, according to me and our captain, Rostam.

We won actually.

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Green Green Grass of Home

2010-01-05T22:37:00.007+08:00

Lina at one of her old haunts - Ben Thanh Market. Some of the people there still remember her!!

Sofia and Nazzim in front of the People's Committee building, near the Opera House.

Lina bargaining. She used to bargain in Vietnamese!!!

Masitah and Sofia.

Rozina, Ariffin, Solehin (Sofia's brother) and two friends. Rozina, Ariffin and Solehin are cousins.

Over Christmas weekend we went to Vietnam, a place where we spent more than 3 years living in the late nineties. I was too busy working to have planned for any other vacation and with the last of my the points from an airline's loyalty program, we managed to scrounge four tickets to the land of what was probably the most famous war in the world ever.

We met Masitah, who looked after Nazzim and Sofia all those years. Sofia was less than four years old when we left and now she is taller than Masitah. Back then, on her first day of work, first day of work, mind you, Nazzim sliced her finger, deep to the bone as a result of him pulling back the knife which she had already held, after thinking that she had managed to coax him into handing it over. But Nazzim had other ideas. Four year olds usually do. She looked after both Nazzim and Sofia and forever I will have this vision of her carrying Sofia whenever we are out in town and she had strict orders from Lina not to let anyone take Sofia from her. Masitah later had children of her own, including a daughter. I don't have to tell what is her daughter's name, do I?

It was a good trip, just three nights there. Enough to do some shopping and see some people who meant something to us. It was sad to leave but I guess we will not wait another nine years to return. One nine-year wait was enough. Maybe we will go again for a visit next year. Yes, we'll do that....

What a Day and Such

2009-12-24T15:45:00.006+08:00

When was the last time you mandi in the rain? Three of Lina's cousins doing just that!!!

Tug of war, we lso simply because the other team had Hulk, The Thing and Andre the Giant on their side!!

The venue, you can see the centre circle for netball. This was before the rain....

Not only they dress you in drag, you have to do the catwalk too!! This is Rahmat, a family friend... Family to be kut?

Lina’s family, mainly mama’s siblings and their children, gathered for our annual family day at Lina’s kampung last Friday and Saturday. All were there except for her Pak Lang and Mak Lang who were away doing Umrah. This family day thing started when one of her aunts passed away, leaving behind four children. The husband remarried and the family was seeing less and less of the children and one of her other aunts decided to have a gathering, spiked with sports and fun activities as an excuse to invite the children over and making it hard for them to say no to.

For the first year or two, the father would just send the children over and then leave. It was probably in the third year he stayed and last year, he brought his new wife along. In her welcoming speech (yes, we have speeches too) then, aruah mama welcomed the uncle (her brother-in-law actually) and his new wife (well, not that new then) just like everyone else. The gathering is held at Lina’s grandma’s house (now one of her aunties is staying there) and the house is one of those built high above the ground where most people would be able to walk under it, except if you are Kareem Abdul Jabbar or someone taller. The area around the house is humongous, enough for the type of events that were lined up.

Last weekend we had treasure hunt, tug of war, futsal, netball, musical chair, throwing and catching water balloons, dress your partner in drag etc. etc. etc. to name a few. Futsal featured only the guys since we tried it co-ed a few gatherings before and the girls thought we guys were too ganas. Actually we were too fast and we squealed a lot less. Now, if you ladies be a bit faster and squeal a lot less too, it might have worked. Tug of war and netball was co-ed. And of course we guys are the GS’s and GA’s (we shoot better) and GK’s (we block better). But the finals on Saturday was decided on penalty throws as the palyers (many of whom are emaks and bapaks) sudah tak larat nak bangun lagi. Playing in the selut really takes your breath away, just like that song.

Then there was the barbecue, the gulai tempoyak and the perkasam. Divine food. We slept under the house for 2 nights, it was a rainy weekend and the nights were cool, thought we need the fans at low speed to take care of the mosquitoes. I woke up Sunday morning with aches all over, as Manickam Appukutty would say it, paining all over. It is still paining all over now, three days later.

As we parted, we spoke the immortal words, see you again next year in kampung. I got a long scratch on my left cheek, courtesy of one of Lina’s cousins (it was a female cousin) playing netball. Shoot, ganas gak…..

Tennis Elbows and Other Sorrows

2009-11-15T23:29:00.010+08:00

For years my left arm have been bothering me. Most of the time I'd ignore it. Earlier this year,when it was diagnosed as tennis elbow, I have had two injections, about three months apart and each time it worked. For a few months until I do something heavy. Like bags or whatever. I have always thought that it was due to an old playing injury, which was probably true too and later, it was from carrying Nazzim and Sofia. To this day, I remember carrying Nazzim, who was about one year old then, at the market. The market floor was wet and dirty and he wanted nothing to do with it. And he was a big one year old.

Even though I am right handed, I carry children (from cousins to nephews and nieces to both Nazzim and Sofia) with my left hand. Even when my left hand was tired, I'd switch but my right hand would only last a few minutes, then it s back to my good old reliable left. Same with carrying bags. Heavy bags.

Last Saturday, I played golf with a rather sore left arm which, by about midway, was on fire. It was aching before but it never bothered my golf. So, the only thing left was to go a doctor and get a referral to see a specialist. An orthopaedic surgeon you, no less. Itu maknanya sudah teruklah tu, heh heh heh. After some questions and a few painful manipulations of my arm, he declared it as tennis elbow. We know that already but this is coming from a specialist meh. And I'm gonna have it forever and ever. It will be recurring. As if I don't know.

The thing about tennis elbow is, it is caused by improper use of the wrists. As the good Dr. Syed said it, "Professional tennis players never get tennis elbows, it is the amateurs who get it, because they play tennis just like they play badminton, with their wrists..."

Ah, I play tennis but I play it with my right hand. Either I am a pro and good at it or I simply did not play enough. Maybe it was the latter. Then it dawned on me that it must have been all the bags and haversacks that I have handled through all the years, how I'd manipulate them with just my left hand, hence, left wrist. I'd pick it up with my left hand, put it over my shoulder with my left hand, hold on to the strap with my left hand, more often than not, with the wrist in some god awful awkward position. That must be it. And oh, the good doctor said that housewives are also great sufferers of tennis elbows - they wring the clothes they wash real good. And I'd usually wring the cloth that I'd use to wash my car real hard. You know how proud we' d be when we managed to wring every single drop of water from any piece of clothing? Yup, pretty proud and bad bad bad for the wrists.

So from now on, I just have to learn to use my right hand, wrist, arm, side a lot more. And just wring a lot less water out of anything.

And of course the injection. Ah, needles.

"It's OK, the needle is out.", the good doctor said as I was still squeezing my eyes shut then. Needles, I try to stay away far far away from them.

So remember, you get tennis elbows when you misuse your wrists......

Aaahhhh....., good to have a good left arm again.....

As a parting shot, what would you do if you are faced with something that is seemeingly insurmountable and not easily discussed with most anyone?

Now, that's a strong left arm............

This Point in Time

2009-11-01T01:27:00.007+08:00

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One of the hazards of working back home is that my time is not entirely mine. I have kenduris to go to, one last weekend and another one today. Weddings to go to, two tomorrow, as a matter of fact.

But then there are also friends to meet, had teh tarik with Wak last night. That counts as my time, that is after I picked up Sofia from tuition and sent her home. Same with Wak too, he had to pick up and send his daughter Amirah home. We finally met just after 11 pm last night.

I have started jogging a bit but this week I was so busy with the staff's midyear performance review that I simply had no time for it. No good. I managed to do so twice last week, once a week for the preceeding 2 weeks, around KLCC Park. It felt good. I remember thinking, through the pain and blurriness, like the doughnut man, again, only I was saying got to run, got to run, instead of got to make the doughnuts, got to make the doughnuts.......

Midyear performance review. The problem with that is, when I have to do it for my subordinates, it could not be a cincai job. Mine cincai OK, but not for the guys and gals. Do, redo, do, redo, review. And do it again and again. For the year end, multiply the intensity by five. Then all of us will just wilt and die. Effort, time, emotions. Just like falling in love.

On a more fairy taley side of things, if there is ever such a phrase, two people whom I know, who knew each other from many many years ago, went their separate ways, then reconnected, might be tying the knot soon. Romantic isn't it? And I had a big part in it - I was the reason they met each other again, three weeks ago. And now they are trying to set a date to tie the knot. Wah, fast one mahhhh.... Strange how a piece of clothing could result in a wedding. Aaaahhhh..... didn't Voltaire himslef said, that love is the ultimate and most wonderful form of madness? Each and everyone of us is a candidate for the casa de loco then. Ah well, good deed done there.

Life, ready or not, here I come.....

And oh, I am not trying to change the world, only the parts that brushes against me.

I Like. Hopefully soon.

Some Things I Will Never Be....

2009-10-13T23:07:00.006+08:00

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Some things I will never be :

A billionaire.
Emak’s favorite.

Some things Lina will never be :

A billionairess.
Mama’s favorite.

Hahahahahahaha……… funny lah you ni H.

One day, during a kenduri at her house, while getting the house, the stuff, the food, the drinks, the everything ready for the kenduri, my Mak Lang (to differentiate from Lina’s Mak Lang), while talking talking talking to Lina, eventually said,

“………..yo lah, H tu kesayangan omak (my mother) kau kan?”

“Huh? H tu kesayangan omak? Mak Lang, H bukan kesayangan omak”, Lina said.

She pondered for a while, and laughed, “Ha ha ha, yo tak yo jugak kan, H tu bukan kesayangan omak kau, ha ha.”

I am not emak’s favorite. Neither was I my late father’s favorite. I have no qualms about that. I maybe seventh out of eight, ya, that’s it, seventh out of eight for I think my Abang Usop is the least favorite, hahahahahahahahahaha…… but he goes on living his life, as I would mine. We learn as we go through life, our skin gets thicker. Some things hurt us, some things do not. Some things do not hurt us anymore. Some things matter, some things do not matter and some things do not matter anymore.

Being emak’s favorite, that’ll be the day.

These are my favorites.....

Sofia's Music Do

2009-10-07T21:59:00.000+08:00

Sofia, having a good time with her cousins Nadia and Farah. Trust me, they are somewhere among the darkness....

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After months of practice, miles of ferrying her to and fro the music school for practice, untold numbers of fast food, late night suppers and heartaches, last Sunday, 7 December, was the culmination of a very long (believe me) hectic period for Lina, me and of course, Sofia.

This year, Sofia played The Beautiful Blue Danube on the piano accompanied by a flute and violins, then she played a string of folk songs on the flute accompanying a posse of violinists and a keyboard and finally she was also in the choir, singing soprano, belting out Mamma Mia, Super Trouper and Ode to Joy.

This concert is a biannual affair that the music school arrange to appreciate the students, teachers and of course, us "Moneybags" parents. We started the day pretty early as they have last minute practice, last minute this and last minute that. Lots of this and that.

It was a tiring day and at the end of the affair, it was a happy one, with proud teachers, prouder students and the proudest of them all. parents, thinking, money well earned, money well spent and money gone, gone, gone, whoa whoa whoa tarrum tarrum tum tum (sung to the tune of You've Lost That Loving Feeling).

And today is my birthday. Happy Birthday... A cake, some candles from Lina and the children made this a very nice day, I must say...........

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Shake Your Hari Raya Booties

2009-10-05T22:47:00.004+08:00

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Selamat Hari Raya to all.

Hari Raya means food, duit Raya and unfortunately, open houses. Kita ni yang go to orang’s open houses will meet orang yang kita tak kenal. People we do not know. Some, as we will find out later, are people whom we wish we have met before and some will make us wonder. One of the hazards of meeting people is shaking hands with with them, especially those who does not look at you when he or she does it. I hate it when people does that to me. I do not do that to people. Good people do not do that to people. Only jackasses do that. Lina gets pissed off when someone does that to her. Even kera's would look at you when you shake their hands. Try it. Pigs too. Not that I have shook a pig's hoofs but ask someone who has. I’ll bet you a dollar that pigs do look at you in the eye when you shake their hands, I mean hoofs.

And to top it up, most of them who do that are Malays, Orang Melayu. Shoot, even our Indian and Chinese colleagues do not do that. At the rate we are going, we may see that day when our budaya that is well known for being so bersopan santun go to the dogs. Shoot, even the dogs would want to stay away from these people. So, usually on our way out of the open houses or majlis's or do's, we’d give those abominations a miss.

Next time when you shake someone’s hands, see if they’d look at you in the eyes and pay you the proper respect as a human being. It's the least we could do to each other. After all, all of us will be in lowered in graves six feet deep and no rich person, powerful person or influential person will be in a shallower grave. If they do not look at you in the eyes, smack their heads. Tell them I told you to do it.

I need a machine gun.

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Long Long Distance Love Affair

2009-08-28T19:15:00.002+08:00

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I was at work (or trying hard to work, heh heh) yesterday when the phone rang.

“Hello?”

“Ash sheshemash ton shmesh blesch fever dmesh clierrrrrrr quarterrrrrrr like meanerrrrrrrr like………” (say it with an American/British/Australian/or all three accents, complete with the sengau voice)

“Wouw wouw wouw wouw wouw miss, miss, miss, miss, miss, hang on, hang on a second, what on earth are you trying to say, slow down, slow down, I can’t understand a single word you’re saying…!!”

“Oh……., I am calling from Singapore. I would like to talk to Miss Zaiton’s secretary on the discussion that we had yesterday and the plan for……………”

“Miss, miss, miss, miss, miss, I think you got a very wrong number, I am not Miss Zaiton and I am not a secretary and I am sorry but there is no Miss Zaiton over here, OK miss? You got that? OK, thank you very much, bye.”

Aiyo, the gall of some people. I would have been very civilised had she started with “Hello, can I speak with Miss Zaiton/Miss Zaiton’s secretary please?” I would have gone, “I am sorry but I think you have the wrong (not very wrong, just wrong) number. But I do declare, you have a lovely voice, may I know your name and can I have your phone number please?” We could have lived happily ever after, you know? But nooooooo….., she went straight to speaking like a redneck who hasn’t seen her brother in a while. Shoot, I have had people calling asking to speak to the charge d’affairs of the Japanese embassy but I politely (and clearly, that’s important – I am sorry but you got the wrong number….. this is not the Japanese embassy…..)

Why can’t people talk simple simple one meh? Kalau you cakap orang putih like orang longkang, then cakap orang putih macam orang longkang lor. Kalau cakap macam orang kampong, then macam orang kampong lor. Kalau cakap macam orang estet, the macam orang estet meh.

Some want to action action. Eksyen eksyen. Aiyo, accident nanti…

I need a new drug….

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Ramadhan

2009-08-24T08:38:00.003+08:00

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Ramadhan means different things to different people.

One of Sofia's friends loves Ramadhan because that is when she usually dreams about her mother. Her mother passed away when she was a little girl. And it seemed that every Ramadhan, she would dream about her mother.

Don't ask me about the details of the story above - it's lovely the way it is and I'd like to leave it that way.

As for us, the reality of Pasar Ramadhan hits home again. On the first day of fasting we bought murtabak singapore tawar tak cukup daging dalam dia and yesterday we bought murtabak mentah tak masak betul and air soya bean tawar.

Today, I will masak my kuih udang sendiri punya. Cukup rasa, bahan and rencah. Cayalah...

Selamat Menyambut Ramadhan.

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Talking About Home

2009-07-16T22:20:00.005+08:00

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Been two weeks since I have been home. I am happy to be home.

On a sadder side, Lina's mother and my uncle, we call him Mamu, passed away within these last fourteen days. Mamu is Bob's father, one of my favorite cousins. He's been sick these last few years and he passed away in the early hours of last Sunday. Lina's mother passed away a week before that. My timing could not have been better. I am glad to be able to be here. I know it meant a lot to Lina. We were not expecting for her to leave so soon. We were thinking, maybe a few more weeks, maybe a few more months but it was not to be. Both of them were buried at the same place. The same place where my father, brother, uncles, aunties, grandparents, grandaunts, granduncles are buried. Good to be visiting all of them again.

There are pleasant surprises sometimes, people have been coming to me and welcoming me back.

"You back for good ain't ya?"
"Good to see you back"

They are friends, all of them.

I look at everything positively now. I rush after work to be in time to pick Sofia up from school. That makes her day. And that in turn makes my day. When Nazzim was home last weekend, we went bowling. Both him and his sister would bug each other when it was the other's turn to bowl. And both of them would have their jig for each spare or strike. Usually the jig for a strike would be more graphic. Nazzim would mimic a mime. Mimic a mime, that's a good one. Sofia would shake, rattle and roll.

Golf is on hold. Initially it was on hold because Lina's mother was sick and she wanted to go back and see her mother every weekend. But no matter, golf is still on hold. We had the school's alumni bowling tournament three days after I came home. We were lousy but it did not matter.

I have always known that I will miss that place. I do and I always will. But it's good to be home. Life is fuller and more meaningful. For me, for me, it might not be so for someone else. For me.

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Homecoming

2009-06-29T13:24:00.004+08:00

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I have not had the time nor the opportunity to update this site over the last 2 months and this will come as something really new - I am transferred back to Malaysia. After 1 year, 9 months and 2 days. That is about a year short than the "usual" 3 years but then there never was a rigid time where one is expected to be in one place. Three years is a nice period to get oneself used to. No, I did not screw up. I probably pissed off some people but that has been known to happen everywhere I go. Everywhere everyone goes for that matter.

Today is my last day here. Over the last one week it has been a blur of farewells at homes, restaurants and a disco. Only once at a disco. Even then it was a restaurant with a disco next to it. It was too good a chance to miss. I was running out of time :

"Oh, sorry, if you did not invite me over during the past 21 months, it's a bit too late now, my diary is full."

Heh heh heh...... I could be cruel at times.....

Sometimes I just feel like staying at home and take a rest. Tonight, a posse of them will come over at my house to cook and just chill out before sending me to the airpotrt,

"I'm not going to cook, you guys, I want to pack and be sentimentol (not a typo), so if you want to be at my house and cook and stay out of my way."

I am going to miss this place. I thought I would not say that but I will miss it. There are 2 things I will miss more than any other - my allowance and the ladies here!!!

Sofia has already booked me to pick her up from school the day I am home. Nazzim has made me promise that I will take him to Friday solat every week. It'll be good to be home. To be with the most important people in the world to me.

I'm gonna be home.

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Holy Express

2009-04-28T12:31:00.001+08:00

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Two minutes forty-five seconds, that was how long the khutbah Jumaat lasted last week. The previous week was two minutes and fifty-three seconds.

We tried out a new masjid nearer to the office over the last month or so, just for a change. The khutbahs at the old masjid were short, but not that short. When we started at this new masjid, we thought it was kinda short. Really short.

Tapi khutbah dia cukup syarat2 dialah. Ada ayat suci al-Quran, ada semua adalah, he he he…. Amende semua tu gua pun lupa dah, tu masa belajar sekolah menengah kut. That was a long time ago, when T-Rex was roaming the plains.

I remember thinking that the khutbahs are a bit short when we first went there. I timed it last week and true enough, it was as I said, two minutes and forty five seconds….. pendek tu…. Yusz told me he timed it the previous week and it was only eight seconds longer.

Musa, one of the guys who reported for duty a few days before we went to the new masjid thought that they were telling us to shut our traps and listen while the khatib is delivering the khutbah, you know, the usual when they said something like “Janganlah kamu berkata-kata semasa khatib sedang membaca khutbah etc. etc. etc…….. maka sia-sia pahala Jumaat kamu.“

“Eh, dah abis dah? Eh, dah sembahyang dah ke? Aku ingat dia suruh kita diam masa khatib baca khutbah tadi. Dah sembahyang ke?”, he went.

“Wei dah start lah, orang nak rukuk dah tu…”

Someone told me dia orang sini Mazhab Hanbali. OK lah tu. Janji gi solat Jumaat kan?

Kalau back home, kalau imam tengah baca khutbah boleh jalan macam itik pulang petang lagi. Kalau sini, imam baca khutbah, get your ass into the masjid as soon as possible because you have about two minutes to do so!!!!

Been hard updating this blog. Can’t access it most of the time here.

Well, at least I found a new drug.

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Starry Starry Night Too

2009-04-04T13:18:00.004+08:00

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I am into that song by Don McLean now. I rediscovered it recently and I usually listen to it just before I go to bed. I'd be lying in the dark or staring out the window, looking at the lights of the town.

I have always been slow in knowing the latest hits. Sofia, on the other hand, is usually very very up to date on thelatest songs or trends, especially for teenagers like her. Me, a song would have entered the charts, made it up to number one, stay there for a while, worked its way down, gets booted out of the charts and I'd probably "discover" it two years later. And in the process I'd managed to miss out on 90% on the other good songs.

I bought myself a docking station for my iPod recently and now, while I cook, eat, do the laundry or just putter around the house, the air would be filled with Malay, English, Hindi, Japanese or Russian songs. Seventy-four songs under "Favourites".

Went to another local wedding recently. As usual, my boss was not around and I had to give the usual speech for the office crowd that showed up. It goes like this - someone, there's always someone with a microphone, and he'd start to jabber things that I could not understand and soon they'd get to the name of the company and my name and all of us would have to stand up in front of the love birds and I'd have to say something to wish them happy long wealthy healthy life with many children etc etc etc. I think I am beginning to be good at this stuff. I'd just include our "bahagia ke anak cucu" stuff, some don't shout at each other unless the house is on fire stuff and more happiness is each other stuff etc. Etc etc. Etc etc etc etc.

This year, in November, it would be twenty years since I married Lina. Twenty years. Twenty years. I'll take another two of those please.

An afterthought.... me below outside the house in Copenhagen that Hans Christian Andersen used to stay in. Uummmhhhh... I smell gingerbread biscuits...

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Offshore in the Cold

2009-02-16T16:48:00.005+08:00

Some of the cosmonauts, heh heh, would like to remain anonymous, Zaki, Me, Amin and Azlan lah, heh heh heh.... You can see all three legs of the jack-up rig and the derrick in the background.

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One fine weekend recently saw me taking a flight to our supply base and the local airport for the trip offshore during this time of the year. This time of the year is not good to go offshore - because of the cold weather, we have to put on immersion suits. I hate immersion suits. You know, immersion suits, suits that prevent you from dying in the freezing water, because in water below or near the freezing point, humans have this bad habit of staying alive for only three or four minutes. I guess the suits adds another hour or so. Or maybe two.

Putting on the suit is a saga by itself. First the left leg goes in. Check for the head cover in the compartment on the suit's left leg. Then the right leg. Check for the gloves in the compartment on the suit's right leg. The suit's legs end in socks like thingys at the end of each leg. Then the hands go in and each suit's arms end in thick elastic bands which grips the wrists. Then the head goes in through the elastic band and this band was meant to grip the neck. Then you zip it up, and the zip goes from the left of your waist up to your right shoulder. Heavy, water proof, industrial zip that leaves you grunting and puffing. Then you squat down while holding the elastic at the neck open to expel air from within the suit. Then you put on the life vest, taking care not to put it inside out or upside down. Only then you put on your shoes, hoping that there is enough space to accomodate the additional socks like thingys that comes with the suit.

Then, when you have reached your destination, you have to take the darned thing off.

I need a new drug....

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The Cookerers

2009-02-05T20:13:00.007+08:00

Some head scratching with regards to the saga facing Aziz and Syamsul.

Three, not one but three pots of curry!!!

Syamsul, Mior and Aziz doing what we do best - being confused together!!

What was to become the most mouth-watering dish this side of the Ussuri River, the beef, the cili bo, the potatoes, the everything lah!

A few weeks ago, some company VIP’s were on their way to our location. As usual, detailed preparations were made to receive them. Accommodations, transport, meetings, things to do, some sight seeing, maybe some shopping and meals.

Meals. Anyone who has travelled long distance must agree that after the check-ins, the infernal plane ride, the inflight meals, the customs, the immigrations, the crowds, the delays, the transits, the queues and not to mention prayers said for checked-in luggage, finding familiar food in an unfamiliar place is a heart-warming experience.

With that in mind, some of us set out to provide some genuine 24-carat Malaysian food. We didn’t want to bother some of the spouses as they have been good at periodically feeding us bachelors (many holding that status in-country only). We tried to get the cook from the camp but it was too late in the day. Zairul was already going bonkers thinking about it, as he was tasked to make sure some sort of Malaysian food was available for our guests. That Friday, in our Bangla van on the way to lunch and solat Jumaat, after hearing Zairul ‘s laments, I had to say,

“Aziz, kita masak kari daging for them nak?”

And Aziz had to agree,

“Boleh jugak…”

Alamaaaakk.... Aziz had to agree with me pulak..... How I wish I had bitten my tongue then. We didn’t know what we had gotten ourselves into. Must be the lack of oxygen in the van, but all the same we set out who is to do what and where. My apartment was picked as place to do the cooking. Aziz and Mior were to buy the beef and whatever else is needed. Wan Shariff volunteered his valuable cache of santan. He didn’t show up but we got the santan from Syamsul, our IT guy on assignment from KL, who showed up and volunteered his neck, adding another hand in addition to Mior and Aziz and Azam. Someone offered a pint of blood, another, his right arm. We then voted to secure Azam’s wife as our consultant. Victory was in the air. We could smell it.

That night, we worked our way through 6 kgs beef, 4 kgs of potaoes. 2 kgs onions. 2 kgs of onions!!!??? One and a half bottles of cooking oil. One and a half bottles of cooking oil!!!??? I never thought we'd need that much onions and cooking oil!

Azam’s wife asked us,

“Halia ada?” “Serai ada?” “Halba ada?” “Daun kari ada?”

“Tak ada.” “Tak ada.” “Tak ada.” “Tak ada.”

“Tak apa, saya ada….”

Talk about a knight in shining armour. Well, maybe a Joan of Arc this particular instance.

Laut dalam nak dijangkau dengan perahu bocor…. Ciiiiissss. Apa punya kari lah yang nak dimasak kalau tak ada halia, serai, halba and of course, daun kari? Well, coffee has been brewed from the soot from a wok’s bottom….. At least in P. Ramlee's movies it had been done.

We started out with a big pot to fit all 6 kgs of the beef, oil, curry, potatoes, santan and everything in between. Then we found out that the pot was too big for the convection stove that I have. We split the concoction into three and went on happily playing the Sorcerer’s Apprentice. At one point Mior had a senduk in each hand stirring all three pots. Cinderella’s step-mother would have been proud.

We ended up crawling into our beds at 1.30 am. Later we heard that our visitors and our bosses ate nothing else but our beef curry. Siap ada yang tapau lagi. Siap ada yang simpan dalam freezer and makan the next weekend lagi. Sejuk rasanya hati ni.... Tak sia-sia ibu mengandung.

Good thing I did not bite my tongue. I wonder if Maxim of Paris is hiring…

Can or Cannot

2009-01-28T14:45:00.006+08:00

My new dig from behind my desk. The discussion table, my vital green tea mug (never say coffee or the good doctor will punish me), my biscuit tin (over the months everything from kuih raya to local biscuits have been in there) and my monitor can be seen. The blinds behind the table is hiding a very busy main road across a parking lot.

From behind the discussion table. Photos of the family behind me. Years ago Sofia asked me if I have her picture at the office. Yes I do, my dear, of your Mama, Along and you. They are now putting a dark tint plastic layer on the glass to the left of the photo, behind the blinds, that is why it is in a mess, it is still unfinished. The desk should be more to the left, pretty much against the blinds. I need a coat hanger - my jacket, which is partly visible as a dark triangle on the right of the photo, is hanging on a pool cue.

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Because of the wall of fire @ firewall at the office, I have not been able to update my blog but lo and behold, today can one.....

Many things have happened since I last wrote. I moved into my new office from my temporary new office at the new building. I got a "corner lot", with glass on two sides but that comes with a setback - the morning sun is too bright (even though it's cold outside) that I have to resort to covering one side of the glass walls with black cardboard paper. That is my to do list. A room about 4 times the size of the previous one, a big desk and cabinets to put all my stuff on and in and a big table with 4 chairs. Plus the 2 chairs in front of my desk and my own chair, that makes 7 sit-downs and I could hold meetings/discussions/pow wows here all the time. Done that. Things could be good at times. Gawd..... this here new office building is mucho mucho mucho better than the old one......

The weather has been playing the bloody fool with us. Only snowed twice so far but so thin. Like none at all. It's kinda of chilly in the morning and it gets to about cool by noon and late afternoon. But then just like an ice cream, when you think that you have it licked, it drips all over you. Bring warm clothing whenever you go out. The last thing you need is to be caught outside with no warm clothing. It freeze severy part of your body, especially that. Of course it's the fingers or nose or ears, what did you think I was implying?

Spoke with Lina daily and Nazzim is home for the Chinese New Year. the house is nearly full again. Nearly. From my daily pow wows with Da Boss, I'd probably get a trip home come 20 February. Do I dare to ask for 10 days worth of leave (which translates to a 2-week period at home)? It depends if he is here or otherwise. Ah well, nicer things have happened and it could happen too you know?

Many happenings here, a few maybe worth writing about. Maybe I will, maybe I won't. That will be about Sofia and that school in Seremban, yes, that all girls school in Seremban and the night me and my posse cooked beef curry for a bunch of VIP's who came here when we simply had to have some Malaysian food for them. That might be good.

Like I said, hope I can access this here place and update this here place once in a wee while. Later world.....

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Hotdog Poser

2009-01-14T20:26:00.004+08:00

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Believe it or not, I cooked fried rice before going to work this morning. Before pergi kerja tu, biasa nak minum air pun tak sempat. Complete with vegetables, ikan bilis, eggs and a frankfurter, not any ordinary piece of hotdog but the tasty, spicy one. Yummy. For three people lagi!!! Ni malam tadi punya ceritalah ni. Pak Lah datang from the training centre, ate at my house but we overestimated the amount of rice that we three would lantak and we got left over with a mountain of rice.

"Ni nasi goreng besok sedap ni.......", adalah wise guy cakap.

So kenalah goreng nasi. I guess when I went to bed last night, I must have been like that donut man - "have to masak nasi goreng pagi besok, have to masak nasi goreng besok, have to...."

The next morning, got up, took out all the things from the fridge, the cabinets. Sliced the onions, the frankfurter and the kobis. Warm up the magic wok, in the meantime had a cuppa of old town white coffee (I am not supposed to drink coffee but once a day against seven or eight times a day previously should be OK ain't it?), heat up the oil, the perencah and etc. etc. etc. and of course after my Yul Bryner, a wokful of fried rice ala dudae simboyo. Spoon licking good. Done with the cooking, while waiting for the rice to cool down a bit, rushed into the shower (masa tu dah berus gigi, OK?) and showered. I got dressed, warmly lah, sojuk now OK? I scooped the nasi goreng up into three tupperwares. One for me, one for Pak lah and one for Aziz. Gave one to Pak Lah ("I biasa tak breakfastlah...") - jangan ngada2, (Oh, tapi pukul 9 or 10 I makanlah) and carried the remaining two to the office.

After the morning operations meeting, before the risk management meeting, makan punya makan, I noticed that I only got two pieces of the spicy, yummy frankfurter, maybe the size of a 20 sen coin. Ini tak adil, aku tipu.....

I called Pak Lah, "Pak Lah, nasi you banyak tak daging dia?"

"Banyak, I pun heran kenapa banyak sangat...."

Makan jambu, tak guna betul. Ceduk punya ceduk pagi tadi, punyalah nak cepat, ada tupperware dapat banyak daging, ada dapat tak ada daging.......

Ciiissss.....

I need some more daging spicy sedap.....

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Just Another Day

2009-01-12T17:09:00.000+08:00

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It has started to snow today, the first snow this year. The weather is so unpredictable. It would be cold for a few days and then it would heat up again.

It was a typical weekend day for me. I went out for dinner last night, then for a few drinks with some of the guys and I arrived home just after 1 am. The book I am reading now kept me awake until about 2.30 am before I decided that I’d better sleep lest I’d waste away the daylight hours today. I woke up at 8 am for solat subuh, the sun does not come up until 8.22 am, went back to sleep and woke up again at 11 am famished. I cooked some rice and Lina’s ikan bilis goreng berlada never tasted so good.

While eating, I got a call about an accident offshore and we have to evacuate someone from the rig. There goes our statistics this year. I just needed to know that the injury was not life threatening – and it wasn’t, ten stitches and some bumps and bruises. Made sure all who needs to know does know about it and went about setting up the investigation team. They’ll go today – a holiday here (Memorial Day) and too bad it will screw up someone’s weekend. I knew that when I saw the drilling manager’s name on the call ID, it wasn’t going to be good news. Not at noon. If it is a few hours before noon, it could be an invitation to lunch. Had it been a few hours before dark, it could be an invitation to dinner but not during lunch time and dinner time. Which means, I have to eat my own cooking!!

Spoke with Lina as usual whenever I am in the office. What else, about the childrenlah. And oh, my niece Aina delivered her first child, a daughter on Hari Asyura. That is my sixth grand niece/nephew. She’ll be sharing her birthday with Sofia, who was born on that day too. Nazzim was born on Awal Muharram. I have to find out what day I was born according to the Muslim calendar. Lupa weh….

I think I’ll go home now and conjure up some ayam masak lemak cili api……

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Of Home

2008-12-27T11:07:00.005+08:00

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Life can be kind sometimes. I'm on my way home after a near miss. A near miss because I only got the OK from da boss at about 4.45 pm. That is late considering I have to get my bag from the house and the flight is at 7 pm. He's away on leave and he simply prefers that I be there when he is away. Auwww, that is supposed to give me a warm feeling huh? No, it simply means that my leave is very very very limited mah, I usually lose one, he's the boss, ha ha. After a series of unfortunate events which happened when both of us were away, we made sure that at least one of us is here at any one time. I was ready to call Lina and tell her that I won't becoming home this time and gonna miss Kamil's wedding and Andek's family gathering. And I have been looking forward to both. And the children have already informed me of their wish list for this trip home. Would they be disappointed or what?

But not after trying out a new small backpack hotel in Bangkok where their idea of an American breakfast is a plate filled with bacon and sausages plus tiny pieces bread and eggs. Scratch that hotel. Stick to Suvarnabhumi Novotel lah.

Right, gotta get out of this lounge and catch the flight to KUL. I love KUL, don't you?

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When I Come Back....

2008-12-24T13:49:00.005+08:00

The view from my bedroom window where I'd be sentimentol, yes, sentimentol, every night before going to bed, smoke that last cigarette and wonder what the he_l am I doing here. The snow is late this year. Only the peaks have a smattering of white here and there, much unlike the photo above.

….I’ll go away again.

The weather is getting colder by the day here. In the morning it is usually six or seven degrees Celcius below zero and it would probably go up to two or three degrees Celsius in the daytime before plunging back to being negative at night.

Over the weekend I had to stay outdoors the whole day while some folks tried to figure out the generator for the new office. You can’t feel your nose, your ears, your fingers, your toes and your n_ts start to freeze. Later that night I made a beeline for the shop to buy gloves and a cap. I can’t find the ones I had last year. Put on two sweaters, what the heck for the next day. But I always forget my long johns. Used to be that siapa yang pakai long johns tak rugged. Let me tell you, when it is cold, just put on the long johns, to he_l with being rugged. Ain’t that rugged if you get frostbite in some strategic spots. Hopefully this year it won’t be minus seventeen degrees and folks at our supply base (minus twenty degrees) will not be without water for two weeks. Imagine, no water for two weeks. Try minus twenty-five degrees offshore.

How was your Hari Raya Haji? Mine was swell. I went back to sleep after the usual solat and one of guys whose family is here was kind enough to provide me with lunch. We had a six-day holiday, read my lips, enam hari cuti. Hari Raya Haji cuti tiga hari, satu hari tu cuti Neutrality Day, campur weekend, six days of bliss. Well, bliss yang boleh sini lah…. Jangan marah, Hari Raya Haji tempat ni cuti tiga hari, macam dia aja yang Islam, orang lain tak. I slept like I have never slept before. The day after Hari Raya Haji, I woke up at 2 pm. Hey, it was my birthday, OK, and some of the guys were kind enough to celebrate it with me. And the nicest thing was, I got a message at 1.45 pm to come over at a friend’s house for lunch. Watched tons of DVD’s and probably watched Notting Hill three times over the holidays, hahahahahaha. Ain’t life dandy?

My birthday, I’m….. never mind, another year older. From Lina, Nazzim and Sofia, I got my birthday wishes from them. But, uh, a cake at the office the following week from the department – they were literally terrified that they have forgotten my birthday. Wei, tolonglah sikit….. wa tak marah la….. I had a hard time convincing them that it is perfectly alright NOT to remember or NOT to celebrate my birthday. The convincing argument was, “Well, we didn’t celebrate some of your birthdays, didn’t we?" That made sense. Well, over the years, it has been not celebrating at all, almost not celebrating at all, someone might remember it, then that someone might remember it, then Lina would remember it and Nazzim and Sofia would freak out over it, Lina and Nazzim would remember it and Nazzim and Sofia would freak over it and Lina, Nazzim and Sofia would all remember it and Nazzim and Sofia would freak out over it. Nice. But sometimes people do forget. Like Lina’s last birthday. I wished her and both Nazzim and Sofia wished her only after I reminded them and Lina texted me,

“you told the children about my birthday ke?”

“did i? they wished you?”

“yes you did. yeah they did.”

Ah well…..I sure hope that we settle this moving office thing soon, otherwise, I am not going home this Friday. Poor Nazzim and Sofia, the long school holidays and I am not home. Well, nearly, we managed to sneak that trip to Bandung last month, didn’t we? I felt like Santa Claus – “….ambiklah apa nak….” Well, up to a point. I simply had to tell Sofia that she could not buy all the Roxy, Billabong or Quicksilver merchandise that she sees over there. We arrived with one piece of luggage and left with four. And a much thinner wallet. Spending time home always ruin my mood on the way back to work.

I tried the new kuali/wok/kazan that I bought recently and its size allows me to cook fried trice just like the Chinese cooks in the movies. There was a lot of movements and noise and bits of pieces of fried rice flying around (but no fire involved as it was a hot plate stove) and I must say that with the right equipment I do cook a wicked wok of fried rice… ceh, puji diri sendiri nampak? Just don’t scrimp on the cilli, ikan bilis and eggs.

Wei, I’m talking about cooking……..I need a new drug.

Drama You...

2008-11-14T21:19:00.002+08:00

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The UPSR results were out yesterday. Lina told me that Sofia was quite cool until the last few days before they were out. Then she seemed to tense up a bit. No good, I was not too worried about what she’d bring back, more about what it would do to her self confidence and how it will affect her standing among her friends. Sometimes it matters, sometimes it does not. Boarding school? No need meh……. Unless she wants to go to the same school with her brother, of which she is adamantly against. Maybe that all girl school in Seremban (her choice, not ours) or that school in Cyberjaya which used to carry the name of a pond. We used to call that school the fish pond school. A compromise.

Anyway, Sofia went to school as usual. Lina followed suit at just about noon, when the results were to be announced. The way they did it in her school was to call out the ones who obtained all A’s (5A’s) alphabetically. They went right down the alphabet, got to “S”, and, and, and………………… no Sofia.

“Ma…..”, she looked at her mother realizing what this must means – she’s not one of those who got the desired results, the 5A’s.

She started crying. Her mother, seeing how sad she is, started to do likewise too. Lina told me later that she was so sad in seeing how disappointed Sofia was, that’s why she started to cry. I'd probably cry too.

“Tak apalah adik, tak dapat 5A pun tak apalah……”

It turned out that they somehow missed her name. She got the coveted 5A's. That cikgu caused so much heartache meh…. Only one pupil in her class did not get 5A’s. I spoke with Sofia today and she told me that the poor girl is still crying. But then, for all we know, she is the one who will be breezing through the SPM examinations five years from now. Defeat is the soil on which victory blooms. Stop crying little girl....

So Lina said that she knew how it felt like when Sofia did not get the desired exam results. At least for 15 minutes that is. Cedeh you….

I need a new drug.

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Happy Anniversary

2008-11-10T18:46:00.001+08:00

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Today is our 19th wedding anniversary. Nineteen years of marriage. Nineteen years of being together and apart. Nineteen years of ups and downs and everything in between. Nineteen years of agreements, disagreements, passionate conversations, silence and everything in between.

Last night I messaged Lina, thanking her for the love and the life that she has given me. Just her luck, I’m away during our anniversary, but she has grown used to it. We moved so much and I was away so often that she said marrying me was worse than marrying a soldier. Her father being an officer in the army, she was adamant that she’d never marry one for that particular reason, only to marry me and suffer a similar if not worse fate.

You’re stuck with me, dear. I’m here, you are there.

Nineteen years but it felt like only nine or ten. And there is Nazzim and Sofia to make out lives noisier, costlier, happier, merrier, exhausting, more heartaches but fuller. Can a man ask for more? Maybe another forty years so that we’d get to see all our grandchildren and great-grandchildren huh?

Happy Anniversary to us.

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Health Walk

2008-11-08T17:42:00.004+08:00

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The good doctor organised a "Health Walk" along the route over the mountains a few miles south of the city. It is an 8-km trek, up and down and up and down the mountain as we go.

The good doctor at the start of the track. Behind her is Khairizul and daughter.

The thing is, all the transport will be waiting at the end point. Either you start and finish or pretend to start and then chicken out. The temperature was in the low teens, I had only an hour of sleep after sending some guests home just a few hours before and 8 km is a very long way. Khairizul's daughter keep pestering him to go faster and catch the others, but there was a catch - he was carrying her on his back!!!

The view from about 500 m up. We ended up to about 2800 m above sea level.

I guess pride played a part. Some of the guys, and gals were running up the track. Granted that many of them are nearly two decades younger than me but then there's life in these bones still. Ain't gonna take things lying down.

Tai Chi lesson gone wrong. How come there aref our different poses? I swear that there was only one si fu....

Don't let the pace of Tai Chi fool you. It is difficult!! You'd think that it would be a cinch to follow it since it is so slow. Yeah, right.

I made it!!!! Now I can look at those young punks in the eyes and tell them that I finished the walk too. Who cares I took an hour longer. I don't.

The first 3 kilometres were the hardest. Then when you reached that point, there is simply no turning back it would mean walking over the same distance either way.

Precious Times

2008-10-19T14:00:00.005+08:00

Pretty soon, weather like the one seen above will be gone. Taken at Chuli, May '08.

I am Suvarnabhumi Airport now, it's 1 pm, Sunday, 19 October 2008. The problem is, I should have been here thirty hours ago. I was supposed to catch the Friday 7 pm flight out of Goatsville but because of a few things not completed at work, I have to delay my flight home for some thirty hours. Things I should have done over the week. Things I could have done over the week. But then, come to think of it, I tried starting many of the things, I managed to most but not all and a few was left out until last Friday. Then there was the meeting with Greater Goatsville's Agency's people. A meeting, where, ha ha, I nearly lost my temper, ha ha. Again. Kecik aje aku nampak mamat tu.....

I really really had no choice but to change to the flight this morning. Grrrrr..... I'm angry with myself really, for poor time management. But then, the last week was a busy one, with No. 2 coming here. In case some of you are trying to be funny, no, it was not Wife No. 2 OK, don't have one. Then hosting the Hari Raya Open House. That was a lot of fun. Ya, there was a lot to do. Meor's farewell. Problem with the goat techs, both in Goatsville and back home.

Yes, there was a lot to do but there were lessons tobe learned - use at least 8 of the 8 hours that I have everyday at work!!

The weather is starting to get cold again. I bring a jacket whenever I go out. Some of us were caught with Tshirts only a few days ago and the next day at the office, a few were seen booming away their sneezes. Sojuk lor, sekarang ni.

So, another few hours of waiting and surfing in good old Suvarnabhumi before the flight. God, I think I can apply for permanent residency at this airport ma....

Diam tak diam, when I returned home for Raya last month, it was exactly a year since I took the new posting. Not an easy year. Not an easy posting. Not an easy job. Another two years maybe before all my hair and sanity starts to go. That's it. Enough. On most nights, before I go to bed, I'd open the bedroom window, have a smoke, stare out towards the town me and wonder - What the f_ck am I doing here? Is the price I am paying too high? Are they paying me enough for this?

Ah well, just get on with this thing called life then........

F.R.A.N.C.E.

2008-10-16T21:56:00.002+08:00

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A friend, Meor, left us today for another job somewhere else. He’s left to join his family and greener pastures and certainly better futures. I am glad for him and his family.

But I lost a good friend. He was well on his way to becoming a better friend, just like another friend I wrote about a while back. I have known him less than a year and sometimes thinking about it, it seemed unfair that such a good person could just move away and be gone just like that. I have lost a friend who started us to take up cycling here. I have lost a friend who said that I prompted him to cook when I invited him over for a meal or two earlier this year. I have no clue why but I guess any home cooked meal is better than most of the meals that we can find in the restaurants here. He is the only person who eats cili api with hotdogs, baked beans and fried eggs for breakfast.

“Wei, aku pun suka makan cili api tapi taklah dengan American breakfast!!!”

Now when we say ”Mior”, we mean the only “Mior” left here, for when “Meor” was here too, we’d have to say “Mior I” or “Meor E” as there were two similar sounding names. Now we don’t have to bother anymore for we know that we will be talking about “Mior I” only. We can drop the “I” now, for there’s no “Meor E” anymore.

His parting words before he left Aziz and me was, “Too bad I didn’t meet you guys earlier”.

Yes, too bad since, I got a friend here back after a year, only to lose another one to a brighter future.

You win some, you lose some.

I need a new friend.

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Balik Kampung and Sentuhan Kasih

2008-09-26T11:21:00.009+08:00

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I left a comment on my buddy's blog (http://www.klazz@blogspot.com/) about a commercial on TV about Hari Raya.

Hari Raya Aidil Fitri is just around the corner and I will be going home today, Friday, 26 September 2008. Now is the time to savour the last few hours of being here and fasting here. I have always written that I was deprived of balik kampung, the Malaysian phnomenon that is, for Hari Raya in my younger days. Now, nah ambik, balik kampung kena terbang sampai sampai berbelas jam…….

Well, as I commented on my buddy's blog, it is exactly 8.10 am Friday morning where I am at and I have a 7.10 pm flight home to catch. Another 11 hours. I have got all my bags with me here at the office. Exactly 17 hours later I will be landing at KLIA. I know the meaning of balik kampung for Hari Raya now. In the commercial, it was about a mother and her son, who came home for Hari Raya. I will go see my mother before Hari Raya and I will see her during Hari Raya and I will go see her after Hari Raya....

Never has a flight been so looked forward to...

To all, Selamat Hari Raya and Maaf Dzahir dan Batin..... and oh, below are photos at some of us giving away some goodies for orphans and some children from poor families where we are at, Sentuhan Kasih or lebih kuranglah, that was yesterday....

Our host's children giving away some of their very own dolls and toys...

Another scene during the program

Giving away some duit Raya...

A donor with whom must be the cutest recipient. She is 5 years old. And she smiles readily despite all the hardship that she faces very early in life.

Another view of some of the recipients. The little girl looking this way is an orphan. She and her 6-year old twin brother, nearest to camera, and four older siblings live with an uncle. Their mother died giving birth to the twins and their father died soon after. The eldest, a 16 year-old girl, works after school daily, earning about USD 35 a month. We just want to cry when we look at them......

The Fast and The Furious

2008-09-18T15:28:00.003+08:00

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And I’m not talking about a Japanese movie.

I am talking about the state of the solat terawih here. Imam Flash is alive and well and he is faster this year. Solats isyak, terawih, 20 rakaats, and witir, your standard 3 rakaats, throw in your solat sunat, all in 40 minutes. Adeh, my knees were creaking and back was aching.

But once in a while, the slower imam will take over. Imam Steady. I was tempted to call him Imam Rock Steady but that simply would not fit in the overall template of Ramadan.

Uh, a breath of fresh air. Steady as she goes.

Today's fasting - tired and sleepy. Weak at the thighs and my stomach feels lousy... I'm hungry. I'm hungry. I'm hungry....

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Tashkent

2008-09-15T16:01:00.007+08:00

The view from my hotel room, with the lights from within the room reflected onto the window. That there tower is a communications tower, just like our KL Tower, I reckon....

Tengah2 bulan puasa ni kena pergi jalan pulak. Aduuuhhhh...... I ni am not the paling kuat punya orang when I puasa, so, traveling bulan puasa ni, ada sikit tak suka, tapi dah terpaksa. Anyways, yes, anyways, it is to Tashkent, Uzbekistan. The old silk road pit stop. I have never been there but I have some friends there, so it should be OK.

I left for Tashkent last Wednesday night and we flew in just after 1 a.m. I was pleasantly surprised. Tashkent is nice. They actually have signboards that say welcome and you do feel that they mean it. I saw a customs or immigrations officer smoking at the airport. While waiting for our transport, I saw people smoking in the waiting area and the streets. Which means that the folks here are a bit freer to do things. I like this place already. During the drive through the city, I noticed another thing – their police have sidearms. Pistols. Sepitol. Guns. In holsters, but they have them. So the government here at least trust most of their policemen.

The view from the front of our regional office. The lanes are four-wide in each direction.....

Another view from the front of the office, a tad to the left of the photo above.

The next morning simply confirmed my initial thoughts. This place is nice. I feel envious of my friends here. To top it up, I got a call from a crony, E, a partner in many wild nights in many places all over – he’s in Tashkent too. If bad girls go everywhere, news about me goes there too. The roads here are wide, all over the city. Eight lanes of roads throughout the city. Trams. Subway. And oh, it was nicknamed Moscow of the East during the existence of the USSR. The people seemed friendlier. The hotel staff are at least a million times better than the ones from the land of the you-are-giving-me-work-to-do. The name of the girl who checked me in was Sitora Saidkhodjaeva. Drats, I should have taken her photo. I don’t even have to talk about the women here. They are gorgeous, that is all you are going to get from me. The first night there, I iftared at the restaurant in the hotel and the service was superb. I don’t know what the food was but it was sea food and it was good. Seafood? This here place is landlocked tighter than anything else. Well, maybe seafood from the Aral Sea, or what’s left of it. I can’t be choosy, I was hungry. The waiter was bringing me stuff I did not order, compliments of the chef, he kept saying, compliments of the chef. Good enough for me, keep them coming.

A view from the 13 th floor, where our offices are at. We are not superstitious, obviously.

Another one from the 13th floor. Superstitious? But two earthquakes in three weeks and three in a month with one measuring 6.3 on the Richter scale. Hmmm.....

A street view of Tashkent. Notice the tram and rail lines. The roads are a bit run down but this is due to the weather....

Daewoos all around. Most of the time, all the vehicles surrounding us are Daewoos.

One word describes the roads here, Daewoo!!!!! There are so many Daewoo cars and trucks, vans and buses here you’d think that you are in Daewooland. The main reason probably is that Daewoo has a factory here. Not sure if they only assemble or actually built them here. Maybe just put them together. Terror is being in a car going through the streets Tashkent at break neck speeds well after midnight over the bumpy roads, tram tracks and everything else in a tiny Daewoo the size of a stunted Kancil driven by a Korean Uzbek named Sasha Alexander.

“Sasha, you don’t look like a Sasha Alexander to me.”

“I know, but is OK, I Sasha Alexander. I no speak Korea but I speak good Russian and manoga Uzbek….”

Well, there are many Thomas Kings or Edward Henrys in Malaysia who do not look like your typical Thomas King or Edward Henry.

Ah well, in Tashkent, I found a new drug.

Pose - Not of the Photo Kind

2008-09-07T17:14:00.004+08:00

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Pose, puasa, fasting, tak makan, tak minum, tak hisap rokok, tak buat benda2 yang tak senonoh yang biasa di buat. Hahahahahaha..............

I got a great start to the fasting month. On the first day, I was sending Nazzim back to his school and got mad while driving, nearly killed an old man who was driving a Wira and got into a shouting match with a d_ckhead driving another Wira. Scared the hell out of Nazzim and that first day ended with definitely definitely definitely no pahala puasa. Only lapaq aja. Lapaq ayaq and lapaq lauk. And lapaq nasi. Hentah2 dapat dosa gak. Left for Bangkok that nite - punyalah kesian @ pity, tak sempat iftar/buka/break fast kat rumah. God, the airline schedulers could be so so inconsiderate. Imagine buka puasa at the airport, so many people but so lonely - kalau puasalah, kalau tak puasa tak bukalah....

And of course, the next leg of the journey on the airline with the makanan paling tak sedap sekali dalam dunia, no problem at all lah. The stewardess came and asked me about dining (ceh, dining tu! Nasib baik bukan fine dining) onboard probably five times during the journey - finally offering me just maybe bread and coffee - itu so-called stewardess beragama Islam tu, so ignorant are the kambings of the fasting month - I was debating on whether to tell her that her food is simply lousy or wei, bulan posalah, orang posalah, tak makanlah (kalau posalah) but I decided just to ignore her and plead sleep depravity. She would not understand anyway.... nanti kang, on the second day pun nanti lapaq aja, pahala semua tak dapat nanti. Ceh, macam so far banyaklah dapat pahala posa. Hentahlah. One day we will see that big account book in the sky and we will know whether all of posa and whatever is kira or not. We'll see. Nazzim and Sofia will laugh at "we"ll see" - whenever they ask for something and if either Lina or me says that, it means dapatlah tu.

Well, nearly a week of fasting here and I must admit that I kinda fared better than when doing the same at home. No headaches, due to enough sleep. After sahur can sleep another 1.75 hours, you know? No traffic jam meh, 5 minutes to office one? Sleep early some more. So far buka at home twice and at rumah orang three times. There was supposed to be buka rumah orang a fourth time but somehow there was a mix-up, the transport was late and a pissed-off me opted to go home and eat maggi rather than arrive late. Actually it was at a local's house and I was not too crazy to eat their food and was reluctant to go and hey, presto, I got my wish, hahahahahahahahahahahahahaha................. life could be kind sometimes and we do get our wishes granted by the fairy god mother. Trust me, the maggi was better. Kira buka puasa dekat rumah orang three times only, yang satu tu tak kira, tak boleh makan pun.

No buka puasa outing here. If they have Pizza Hut or McD here, that would be nice. That would be enough. I am sick of the local fare. No pasar Ramadan here. If they have it too, it would not have the food that we need. Need, not want, but need.

The solat terawih are as fast as it was last year but the pak imam took a page out of some of the masjids back home - in the middle of the solat terawih, they would hold a tazkirah, effectively holding the people who are there at ransom. Ah well, pandai jugak psychology kominis ni..... So, they have found another way to scare people off. Well done. A Hero of the Whatever pingat to him.

Another day another dollar. Can't wait to go home for Hari Raya.

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Life and Times of Eddie A.

2008-08-18T21:12:00.006+08:00

The bane of cyclists all over the world - punctures!!! I've had four so far!!! Fixing one in front of the mesjid yesterday.....

Two members of the cycling club at the roundabout near the airport, Friday 15 August 2008. It's about 8 km away from our homes. Pretty place, with the lights, fountains, lovers and all....

Ignore the title of this blog, I can't think of one.

The rides have been going on well. More rides, more punctures, plus that one time when a tire literally blew up. That was fun. All three of us were chased by dogs yesterday, good thing again, the dogs are small mutts, eager to run back to their owners with that I thought them a lesson look on their doggy faces. Mutts.... Got sand thrown at us by some monkeys - local young monkeys, some kids asking us where we bought our bikes and some intellectually challenged people here who kept pointing at our expensive bikes/expensive wheels/nike shoes/adidas socks while shouting something and laughing histerically afterwards. The poor people, we know it is hard to live with no brains and lesser will to work. Don't say the W word here.

That was yesterday, now we go back a bit.

If I wrote about my nephew Farouk who got 10 A’s (8 A1’s) a few years ago, his sister Farah got 11 A1’s last year. Maaaaaannnnnnnn…….. what are these kids’ brain made of? I hope she gets to do what she wants to do, the last was medicine but then it could change at a moments’ notice sometimes.

I must be a pushover. I guess I am at times. The last time I was home, we went to buy a pair of sports shoes for Nazzim since his present pair is in a bad state. We could not get away with buying only a pair for Nazzim, even though Sofia’s are still usable. We ended up with a pair costing RM 179 for Nazzim, RM 199 for Sofia and RM 69 for me.

At work, Dr. Durli enrolled the help of others, in this case Nina, the head translator, to get me to buy medicine after the session at the hospital here recently.

“Mr. H, why aren’t you buying your medicine? I heard you did not want to buy your medicine as instructed?”

I opened my drawer took out the prescription and a wad of money that I have put aside for the medicines. With both hands, I offered it to her.

“I was going to buy it, see, I even have the money ready but I couldn’t find the time. I was going to buy it…..”

“Come with me, we find a driver who’ll buy it for you…..”

Great, now I have a bundle of pills and a tube of greenish paste that tastes like motor oil to take everyday.

On a more hilarious front, one of my colleagues related this anecdote to me. He has been out interviewing local candidates for some vacancies in our offices.

“What is your name?”
“My name is John Smith”
“How old are you?”
“I am twenty-two years old”
“Which school did you go to?”
“I went to Public School No. 14”
“Which University did you go to?”
“I went to the Polytechnic Institute.”
“Where is your hometown?”
“My hometown is Gorat.”

Anything strange about the dialogue above? Of course not, it looked like a typical question and answer session.

OK, here is what it really is. The above dialogue was narrated by the interviewee himself, both the questions and answers. Since their English is non-existent, I guess they have been doing some question spotting and practising but somehow someone forgot to tell this guy to spit out the answers only and not both the questions and answers.

Aisey man, I need a new drug.

Ride To Live

2008-08-06T19:09:00.006+08:00

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In an effort to attract more members to join our exclusive club, The President and President of Vice of the Ahalteke Club of Axxxxxxx sent this email to some prospective folks.....

Dear Ahalteke Club Members (Present and Future),

The President of the Ahalteke Club of Axxxxxxx (His Honourable Mr. Meor), and myself (President of Vice of the Ahalteke Club of Axxxxxxx) are willing to forgo our Saturday (9 August 2008) morning ride to accompany future club members Mr. Hafiz and Mr. Amin (yes, two of them, Mr. Hafiz and Mr. Amin, go ahead and count) to Tulkuchka Market to buy their horses. Last Saturday, future club members Mr. Hafiz, Mr. Shohrat and myself did a survey of the available steeds in Tulkuchka market (it was hot!!! 50 degrees C and no kidding!!!) and found two likely models, each costing 1.9 million and 2.0 million zolkas respectively. Both have front and rear suspensions and disc brakes (just like Mr. Zaki’s motorcycles). This Saturday, Mr. Shohrat will accompany us, to act as translator and negotiator. Any reduction in price, the President of the Ahalteke Club will have the right to claim 50% of the sum, the negotiator will have a right to the remaining 50% but both have decided to forgo this privilege. This time. Mr. Hafiz likes the 2.0 million zolkas model. He likes the handle especially. Mr. Amin has yet to see either but I have a feeling he will make a wise decision as well.

Future club members, if you want to start to ride immediately, then we (the President and President of Vice of the Ahalteke Club of Axxxxxxx) suggest that you get a local steed, ride for a few weeks, before deciding on whether to purchase imported horses. Of course, we (the President and President of Vice of the Ahalteke Club of Axxxxxxx) have vested interests – we want to rope in as many members as possible into our club. But having said that, we guarantee (to all spouses and the like) that we do not encourage unhealthy practices such as dangerous riding or drinking while riding. For your information, yesterday, Tuesday, 5 August 2008, your President and President of Vice of the Ahalteke Club of Axxxxxxx rode from Molanepes (from Bitarap for President of the Ahalteke Club of Axxxxxxx) to the new office and back, a total of 20 km, suffering two punctures. In the dark. And we don’t speak French. The people around us don’t speak Japanese. That does not really matter as no one speaks English and we don’t speak Ukrainian or Tatar. But luckily we brought along spare tubes. And pumps and allen keys and star allen keys and various spics and specs that we might or might not need.

Should future club members Mr. Hairri and Mr. Rizalman wish to trust our judgement and wants us to buy the horses on their behalf, we would be glad to do so, subject to an interest rate of 0% (zero percent) per day. Note that should we be successful in attracting more members, then we could act on attracting members of the opposite sex. Or opposite gender, that sounds better. Then we worry.

It would be great if we could have a ride Sunday morning, totaling more than 3 riders (our total number of members so far. The other one being Mr. Ramzi, President of Nice of the Ahalteke Club of Axxxxxxx). Trust me, after riding 30 km, breakfast at Sazada near Nissa Hotel would not taste any better. And the sleep that all of us will need after that could not be any sounder. Thank you.

Regards,

Hxxxx
President of Vice
Ahalteke Club of Axxxxxxx
Ride Lively, Live lovely, Love Lively

P.S.
Ahalteke is the name of the local breed of horse, reputedly the best in the world. It is said that the Arabs came to this part of the world and brought the camel and took back the horse that eventually became the Arabian. A fair trade you think?

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Anjing Ketot

2008-07-02T21:14:00.002+08:00

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After work yesterday, I went to help a colleague, Meor, put together his bicycle that we brought from back home. The geniuses at the forwarding company managed to ruin his bike – they broke a component, a strip of aluminium about the size of my pinky, that is used to attaché the rear wheel’s gear-changing mechanism to the bike. Without that there thing, we don't have a bicycle. We managed to machine a copy of the thing at a workshop here.

Once we put together his bike, I went home, got changed and cycled to his house, about a kilometer or so away. One of those nice episodes in life. We just cycled by the highway nearby, only turning back when it got dark. He went home and I veered off to go back home too.

Later, I messaged him,

”wei meor, aku kena kejo anjing tadi. nasib baik anjing ketot, kalau kena alabai*, lunyai aku. basikal aku pun dia makan. dua ekor pulak tu. nasib baik dua-dua anjing tu ketot.”

On the way back from Meor’s house, I did some thinking. It was good being able to exercise a bit and enjoy it. I guess cycling – in moderation – is a good exercise for me now. Now, subuh here starts just before 4 am. and ends just before 6 am. When I wake up for solat subuh, and I don’t go to the office until 7.40 am, that gives well over one and a half hours to do something. I could cycle for half an hour a few mornings a week. I’m not that ambitious, a few mornings a week would do. Jogging is simply too violent at times. Hard on the ankles, hard on the knees, hard on the hips, hard on the flab and finally, hard at this age, heh heh. At my weight, I should have been another 10 inches taller. But I am not. So I guess cycling is a good way for me to lose weight, put back some steel muscles where steel muscles should be. Maybe if the results are good, I could take it one step further and maybe graduate to going to the gym, put more steel on those steel muscles where steel muscles should be, go on to winning the Mr. Universe title once or twice, or three times, star in a few movies, after which I’d be the Governor of California.

But that was when those Cujos ketot brought me back down to earth.

* alabai – a local breed of dogs that are huge. Just a little smaller than your St. Bernard.

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Jeritan Batin Ku

2008-06-27T13:53:00.003+08:00

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This would be my ninth year of working away from home. When I mean away from home, I mean it would be somewhere where I cannot simply hop into a car and drive back to wherever I’d call home. It does not matter if it is a four-hour or twelve-hour car ride but I can’t, I’d need to board a plane to get home, wherever home is. Which does not necessarily means out of the country, out of Malaya too is possible yes?

Being away from home means I missed on a lot of things over those nine years. Weddings, funerals, kenduris, a few Hari Raya Puasas, many Hari Raya Kurbans and parties, both wild and tame. So far I have been able to take Lina with me and later Lina and Nazzim and later still, Lina, Nazzim and Sofia.

But not this current location. Lina would like to stay back home since she :

i. is tired of following me.
ii. wants to be close to her increasingly elderly parents.
iii. is worried about the children’s education, especially Nazzim’s.
iv. does not cherish the fact that we have to mothball, sell or give away our belongings.
v. does not cherish a few more years of shuttling between our parents’ houses while on holiday.

She swore that when she married me, it would be an easier life than her mother. Lina’s dad was an army officer. But that was not to be the case. In the first seven years of our marriage, we stayed in three countries, four locations and six houses. When I was about to leave for this assignment, one of her friends asked her if she was worried about being left behind.

“I have been left behind since the day I married him.”

Yeah, repeatedly. As sure as there is the sun and the moon. From the shortest one night to the current six weeks or two months or so.

Sofia has marked up her pound of flesh early this time.

“Pa, the next time you are home we go to KLCC ya? Adik nak iPod Nano, a new phone and………”

I stopped her before she could finish.

“Can I ask you why should I buy you an iPod Nano and a new phone, among other things? You have a perfectly good phone and we bought you that MP4 or MP3 or whatever player?”

She just shrugged and said, “I’ll tell you later.”

Tell me later what? Forty years or so living in this world and I have no smart retort to a teenager? Teenagers!

Nazzim was a bit more sensible. I was away during his birthday last week, 21 June, and he said that he’ll wait till I am home to collect.

I think my next trip home will cost me dearly. The children are wise enough to know their father does have that guilty feeling of having to work away from home and they are wise enough to milk it periodically.

Things are crazy at times. Just today I got a call that we have to commit to buying 3 tankers by end of this month or we will lose those tankers, which we will need in about 20 months’ time. Hey, I can commit anytime but whether my word is good enough is another thing. There is such a thing as an approval process. We can’t just commit seventy million greenbacks just like that. Seventy bucks, anytime…. Then me and the sports committee had to go to our supply base and project site as thay are having their final sports day and we at the capital here ought to go and participate. So, because of the good job they did over here earlier this month, the committee were rewarded with the trip. Yeah, right...... reward someone by sending them to a place they do not want to go to.

"H____, we must show our support, so you also go with the committee lah."

Of course boss, I yang jaga kedai ni kena pergi lah....

I am away from my family, I work fourteen hour days, I eat strange food or worse still, eat what I cook myself, and back home people are hitting us front, left and center. Even if the reasons are right, which they are not, it is not fair. We do not live like kings. We risk our lives flying offshore, to our sites and we miss our families. Whatever money we make, we spend it at home, on our families, on true red-blooded Malaysians. I wish I could elaborate...

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Itarian Lesign

2008-06-15T13:26:00.006+08:00

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A few weeks ago, while on leave back home, I was in Wisma Central, looking at (the Malay word is belek-belek) mobile phones to buy one for Lina. She needed (and deserved) a new one. Both Nazzim and Sofia has been pestering her to get a new one, ooohhhh, over the last two or three years.

While I was belek-beleking one potential purchase, talking with the salesman about the phone and of course, the price, a girl, maybe sixteen or seventeen years old, came in along with what must be her father.

In true Malaysian fashion, without turning left or right and see if the salesman is busy or otherwise, she just said out loud,

"Itu earphone untuk Nokia model something-something ada ka?"

"Adaaa.....", said the salesman and peeled off from attending to me to take one out of a nearby cabinet and handed it over to her.

"Calmera ada? Calmera?", she said.

"Calmera, waaaahhh......", I thought, "now even earphones also got Italian designed one ah? This must be good, the Finns must be targetting a niche market, young girls in this case, with earphones done by an Italian design house. What will they think of next?"

Visions of Sofia pestering me to get her designer phones, designer earphones, designer satchets, designer bags, designer cases, designer everything with "Calmera" stamped on it started playing on my mind.

"Calmera, Calmera...... Calmera titak ate la.", said the salesman.

"COLOUR MERAH LAH!!!!", said the father, literally shouting.

"Ooohh..., colour merah. Colour merah titak ate....."

Oh s_it, colour merah, red corour. Yes, red corour, as in pink corour. That girl wanted to eksyen with her England slang one until "colour merah" became "calmera'!!! And the father had to stoop down low too, he had to shout at the poor salesman who knows no Itarian.... hahahahaha.

Wei, mamat oi, that poor guy only sells mobile phones, he donch know Itarian one, he he...

I thought that whole episode was very funny. Calmera, god, that was a gem...

I need a new drug. Calmera is the name.....

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Danish Day

2008-06-10T07:56:00.007+08:00

The Old Opera House is on the left and the building in the middle is Magasine du Nord, a shopping center. That's where I went shopping!

The Little Mermaid. Thought she'd be bigger.....

This sampan is owned by the third guy who co-founded or is a partner of Microsoft. Who ah? Bill Gates is one, Steve Ballmer kah the second one but the third one escapes me entirely....

The New Opera House. It does look like RM 1.4 billion....

I have blisters on my feet walking around Copenhagen these last two days. I have blisters on my thigh from my passport in my pocket and I realised it only when the skin broke. Ow....

Went around town, past the house that Hans Christian Andersen once stayed. Hey, I realised that over the years I have visited houses or places associated with Mark Twain, Harriet Beecher Stowe, Noah Webster and J. K. Rowling.

Went to take a look see at The Little Mermaid, the offices of Maersk, only the largest industrial concern of Denmark, plus the new Opera House, built by A. P. Moeller, owner of Maersk. It costs him only Euro 350 million, about RM 1.4 billion. And he presented it to the people of Denmark. Neat. Richly neat. Went on a tour of the canals. Kids jumped from the embankment on purpose, to splash water on us on the boat. Cute, very cute. Went to the Tivoli Gardens. I always thought that the theatres and other places back home are named after a place in India. Only later that I learned that the original name of Tivoli was coined here in Copenhagen.

Met reps of the shipowners, people who run the tankers for the shipowners, brokers and Ilya, their boss. You should hear Ilya's story. Emigrated from the former Soviet Union when he was ten. Has degrees in History, Spanish and International Relations and now runs the biggest shipping company in the inland rivers of Russia. And someone like him still yearns to do more studying - philosophy but for being so busy working now, he's put that on hold. Maybe that could be good advice for Nazzim and Sofia. The world does not gravitate around medical, engineering, law or accounting degrees. But lots of luck and hard work wouldn't hurt either.

And to top it up, I got an invitation to visit St. Petersburg, the offices of the owners of the ships. Neat, very neat.

Can't stop about thinking about how perfect it would be if Lina, Nazzim and Sofia could be here with me. That's it, we'll definitely go somewhere once both Nazzim and Sofia are through with SRP and UPSR later this year..... That would be nice. Besides, Lina said that I owe her big time for taking care of my children, my home, my car and my life back home. Payback time, with pleasure.

Copenhagen and A New Record

2008-06-08T04:58:00.003+08:00

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Saturday, 7 June I was up at 4 am to get ready to go to Istanbul to catch the connecting flight to Copenhagen. Though I went to bed at 1 am a few hours earlier, it was a cinch to wake up. Picked up the last few items that I have yet to put in my bag and off to the airport.

The flight was full and at the airport were two Antonov 124's and a C-17 I supposed, the new USAF transport plane. I think I got the name of the plane right. The 4 hour flight to Istanbul was just fine. Breakfast on board was great. Being Turkish Airlines, everything was halal and the omelette, the pastries, the beef ham was just dandy and the cheese selection was just superb. Burp!! And being used to planes with no entertainmant, the flight had inflight movies and the 4 hours went just like that. Then it was a 4 hour wait at Istanbul and when you travel with interesting people, time flies. My colleague, Naira, who is travelling with me speaks five languages fluently - English, Russian, Armenian, Turkmen and Turkish.

"And a spattering of German, Mr. H...."

From Istanbul to Copenhagen it was also on Turkish Airlines and again, the food was good. There goes my diet. And the inflight entertainment too. But it was only a 3 hour flight so it was over in a blink of an eye. Plus the fact that I slept most of the way. Except when they were serving the food. Yum yum.....

At Copenhagen, Victoria was waiting for us. After a brief trip around the city, we went to the hotel to freshen up and then to dinner by one of the canals. That was when Natalya, Dmitri and Anatoly joined us. The four of them represents the company from whom we are chartering two tankers. For the next two years. Wth an option of another twenty maybe. Maybe that explains why they are happy to see us. Naira has been communicating with them for the last two years or so but they have never met. I guess that makes all of them happy. I'm happy too, I've never been to Copenhagen. Now, to make my boss happy, all I have to do is negotiate a few bucks off the daily rate. That'll make him happy. And his boss will be happy too. When my boss' boss is happy, I'll be delirious..... Visions of a promotion play in my mind. Ah, wishful thinking. As for dinner, I tucked in everything except the pheasant. Plus the chocolate cake and the cappucino. Burp again. But the weather turned cold and there I was in a T-shirt. I resisted the blanket until it was really really ubearable and to hell with being macho and I joined Victoria, Natalya and Naira under a blanket each. Yes, they have blankets in restaurants in Copengahen. Green blankets in today's case..

As for tomorrow, it'll be breakfast, a tour around the city, lunch, another tour along the canals and maybe shopping after that. I have got a heavy agenda on the shopping. Nazzim's birthday is on 21 June and maybe something good from Copenhagen would make him happy. And of course not forgetting Sofia and Lina too.

"Not fair!", that was what Sofia said last week when she heard that I was going to Copenhagen.

"Adik, Papa pergi sebab kerja, You know I'd love to take you, Mama and Along if I could. Maybe I'll take you somewhere later this year when your exams are over OK? We'll see...."

Both she and Nazzim started laughing. For them, "We'll see...." is like a sure thing. Too late I realised what I had just said. Oh well......

For the record, the room I am staying in now must be the smallest I have ever stayed in my whole life. But it's clean, there's a TV, the bathroom is fine, the internet connection I am using now is fast and free and the chances are, I'll only be spending time in it to sleep.

Yawnnnnn....... Good night.

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Another Day and Another Day in Bangkok

2008-06-03T08:17:00.006+08:00

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The last ten days must have been the fastest ten days ever in the history of mankind. By taking seven days worth of leave and taking into consideration travelling time, I had eight full days of being home. Had. At the end of last Sunday, I casually mentioned it to Lina that I have spent the first of my eight days and I've got seven more to go.

"Hush, don't even mention it. It'll only go faster", she said.

It did, no matter what we did. It was a whirlwind of sending Sofia to school daily for the extra classes that her school is having. Trying to run other errands. Straighten things around the house. Do things we identified to be done months ago. Celebrated Sofia's birthday. She's twelve this year. And a handful for Lina. They spar everyday. But there can only be one winner. But in many instances, the are doing OK. Lina wants to have a good relationship with Sofia. I can't have that with Sofia - not when she's got me wrapped around her fingers. Well at times. OK, maybe a little bit more than that but that's it.

God, the day room at Suvarnabhumi is ridiculous!!! USD 165 for eight hours!!! It was that or Novotel, which entailed the trek through immigrations, get my bags etc. Had there been another person with me, I'd go for it. But then, it was enough for a good sleep while waiting for my flight this morning. As usual, without fail, the flight here have its share of important people - people who can't wait to leave the plane, whose phones started beeping the second the plane touched down and those who thinks Bangkok will run away if they are not the first to disembark. Ha ha, that reminds me of an anecdote my sister-in-law told me when she was a cabin crew,

"I'm a doctor, can I have a Coca-Cola?"

You figure it out. If you can figure out where the thirsty doctor is from, I'll give you a souvenir from Bangkok. Something small. Something from Bangkoklah...

It has been 4 years since I started blogging. Here's to you Red.

Oh, on 9 and 10 June, I'll be in Copenhagen for a series of meetings with the owners of the tankers that we are using now. Maybe we'll get to cut down a few bucks of their daily rates so that we could pay for that trip. It should be a cinch. I have never been there. It should be good.

Right, there is a bunch of people around me having breakfast, I presume. At least half of the population of the Indian sub-continent is at this airport this morning - and they are all around me. I feel like having some kari kepala ikan lah. We know that is not possible anywhere except home.

Got to go now. Got me some drugs the good doctor gave me for my blood pressure, hahahaha... No, just when I need it. A few more years, just a few more years...

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Colours of This Life

2008-05-04T15:22:00.006+08:00

Nazzim and Sofia in Bangkok December 2007

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One question that was asked quite frequently is this - what is the worse thing about working at where I am at.

My answer, I miss my family terribly. It is wreaking emotional havoc on me. But then I looked around me and I see that many others are in the same situation. All putting on brave faces. But I know that they are going through the same emotional ups and downs as I am going through. Ah well, life goes on.

Even my trips home were blurs. Like my last one at the end of April. I reached home at 7 pm on a Sunday. That night I managed to get a peek of Nazzim and a few minutes' chat with him at the school gate. Then I went to work at our offices here for the next 3 days and on the fourth day, I went to Terengganu and back again the same day. Then the next day I went and took Nazzim to Friday solat and later picked him up for the weekend home. That was the first time we slept under the same roof since December. He has grown, I think he is only an inch or two shorter than me, much taller than I was at his age. Time was precious. No seeing anyone else that time, haha....

Funny
I bought an iPod for the long trips to and from home on those 7-hour flights that do not have any entertainment at all. None at all. Bad food. If you are lucky, no drunken fellow passengers. Only last week one was arrested when they landed at the destination. My first try with the iPod, I got dizzy. A few reasons for that. Not used to music being blasted right into my brain. I'm too old for iPods. But now OK dah, on the last 3 trips on airplane-with-nothing, I watched a few movies and lulled myself to sleep with it. Money well spent, I must say.

Serious
My high blood pressure is definitely caused by this job, too much salt in my diet and too much kambing. I must have eaten more mutton these last seven months that all the previous years of my life. So, smile at work even though I feel like cracking a few heads, cut down on my salt intake, no kambing, no tea, no coffee and lots of green tea. At least that was what an ECG, blood test and urine test told us. I'll see a quack again when I am home next.

Happy
I am coming home during the school holidays at the end of this month for a short 10-day holiday, not business trip home, yay!! The last time I told Lina that sorry I had to work four out of my six days home but she said "Tak apalah, at least you balik". No wonder I love that person.....

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Coffee, Tea or Me

2008-04-19T13:06:00.009+08:00

The Hagia Sophia. The only reason I did not confuse it with the Blue Mosque was because of the scaffolding.

The Blue Mosque. At least I think it is.

Inside the Blue Mosque.

Now I know why my BP is high. That soup in that basin there is nothing but fat and every known part of a sheep thrown in.

The view of the city and the mountains from my bedroom window.

Maybe lamb chops and beef too.

I took off my ring to play volleyball last weekend and later put it back on my left ring finger, just to give my right ring finger a rest. After a few days the finger began to hurt a bit, and I could not take the ring off. My secretary says that is not good, it usually means high blood pressure. She meant, if the ring can go in but after a few days, I can't take it off, something is not right. Greeeaaaat......... as if I don't have enough problems. Well, she could be right, my head feels stuffy and I have this lingering headache........ As the days go by, it got worse and I still couldn' t get it off. Using soap didn't help. And my finger began to glow - it got red. I rested it for a few days and a colleague at the office suggested I use vaseline, of which she has right there in her office. So, with an ample supply of vaseline, with another colleague's help, after a lot of pulling, turning and pain, lots of pain, I managed to get it out. I knew I had one chance before I would be left with only one option - cut the ring off. But I got the happy ending I wanted, the ring in one hand and a glowing, painful, swollen but ring-free finger on the other.

The only thing left to do was see our resident doctor, Dr. Durli, to check on my blood pressure. Yup, we got a doctor in the house. She wasn't employed for her medical skills but we don't put that to waste. She wasn't in but Jennet was there. Jennet is not a doctor but she said, "Mr. H, my mother is a children's doctor and my father is a famous surgeon". Meaning, her mother is a paeditrician and her father is a famous surgeon. OK, I guess that's OK.

"140 over 100, you have high blood pressure... Normal 120 over 90. You have high blood pressure. No coffee, tea, lamb chops or beef for you. Green tea OK. Fish, chicken OK."

Later Dr. Durli came over and repeated the whole process.

"140 over 100, you have high blood pressure... Normal 120 over 90. You have high blood pressure. No coffee, tea, lamb chops or beef for you. Green tea OK. Fish, chicken OK."

She puts on her doctor face and continued, "I give you medicine, you take and you tell me how you feel OK?"

Great, my medical check-up before I was transferred here said everything was OK. Must be the beef, mutton, coffee and the work, especially dealing with the state authorities here. So, for the last four days, I have been on a diet of what was approved by the good doctor. Well, the headache is gone, the stuffiness is gone and I'll see her again next week.

I just had some drugs, compliments of the good doctor.

Nearly Istanbul

2008-03-19T15:05:00.004+08:00

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I am in Istanbul, for an 18 hour stopover before going home. Istanbul seems nice but, but....

But I am sleepy. The route home through Istanbul, Bangkok and finally Kuala Lumpur entails a total travelling time of 36 hours. Plus the fact that when I boarded the flight last night, I have been awake for more than 24 hours, going to the supply base the whole day and keeping some visitors from home company.

I need to sleep but this danged internet enables me to access the ofice email anywhere anytime and there are things and issues to solve and think about. The internet is a bane at times. That's it, I'm off to bed for a few hours and when I wake up and if there is enough time, I'll take a walk around this city. It is supposed to be beautiful..... we'll see....

I need a new drug...

Update. Well, we did see. I went to the Old Bazaar, bought two leather jackets, a long one for Nazzim since he mentioned he wanted yang "panjang". Baby lamb. Soft. The regulation T-shirts and keychains for the children, apple tea, something Turkish and woven and beautiful for Lina, I don't really know what it is but it is beautiful. Trust me. And other bits and pieces. I am ready to go home... Now, just left to tell Sofia that I'll get her jacket later. Went to the Blue Mosque and Hagia Sofia. To many hustlers there. They readily guess my nationality but many thought I'm Indonesian, Japanese or Korean. Please lah...

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Spring and Missing in the Air

2008-02-23T14:22:00.002+08:00

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I simply have to write about today. I woke up and saw on TV that the temperature today will be between 8 to 12 degrees Celsius. It’s going to be a lovely day. And it is. For the first time in about three months, I walked to the office. All I needed was my jacket. Through the park, passed by the medical school, through Tiki Bazaar, through the bus depot, by the old stadium and in eighteen minutes I was at the office. Lovely, the weather is going to get warmer and warmer. I took a look at some bicycles yesterday and I guess I’m gonna buy one. All we need is to get to the mountains south of the city and I guess there is nothing like the mountains for mountain bikes!! Got one kaki already - Meor the new finance guy is a cycling buff. Me, I’m anything to get my mind off being far away from home buff. I have started buying motorbike magazines, getting ready for the day when I finally get back home and I could finally afford a big bike. Plus the fact that Lina dropped her condition that she gets her swimming pool before I get my bike. So sweet of her. Well, I did offer her a new stove (accepted but no time to buy), a new refrigerator (don’t need a new one), a freezer (she’ll think about it), a real good expensive handbag (accepted but we have not gone out for it, she has to pick one that she really likes, I am not going to spend a fortune on something that she might even remotely not like!!), offered to buy her a watch (she has two already, she really doesn’t need another one), microwave (we’ll use the current one, it’s still good), still owe her two bottles of perfume for the one that I took from her (no one here will know it’s a women’s perfume, I was in a rush) and a Nissan Xtrail or Honda CRV (no, her Myvi is fine). Acah aje tu, I know that she’d decline the car. Wei, I didn’t spend seventeen years with her and not not learn anything about her lah….

First thing I did was to call home. Nazzim is back from school. Lina picked her up this morning and got her friend Adibah’s help to pick Sofia up from her school. What are friends for, isn’t it?

I miss home. I miss Lina. I miss the children. I still have the same lousy feeling whenever I have to get back here. That dreaded feeling. My last trip home last week was the shortest. I left this place on Friday evening, arrived home at 3.30 pm Saturday afternoon and by Wednesday night I was on the way back through Abu Dhabi. The flight to Abu Dhabi was seven hours long but I didn’t even feel it. I was sulking. The eight-hour wait at Abu Dhabi airport for my connecting flight was long. I punished myself by not checking into a hotel, which I could have done, but I just sat there at the airport, sulking again. But I had a gang of Filipino, Indian and Burmese porters to amuse myself. God, how I wish my life is as uncomplicated as theirs. I am going to miss a few of the children’s growing up years. When Nazzim was a month or so short of his second birthday, I went offshore for about two weeks and when I came home Lina and him was already doing this charade that I am sure all of us are familiar with……

“Sayang mama tak?”, she’d ask.

“Sayaaang…..”, he’d say.

“Banyak mana?”

“Banyak langiiiit…..”

“Sampai mana?”

“Sampai hatiiii……”

“Mana langit?”

“Atash langit…..” (he’d point up towards the sky and that is not a typo)

“Mana hati?”

“Inshide hati….” (he’d point to his chest and that is not a typo either)

I sure hope this posting is worth it.

And oh, it’s football time today. The email is out. Should be good. We haven’t played in about three months or so.

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Suffering Leysa

2008-02-17T15:13:00.003+08:00

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Leysa is our language teacher. Our suffering language teacher. While there are hardcore addicts in the drug world, there are hardcore students in our language class. Pelajar-pelajar tegar. We who never give up. We hope neither will Leysa. Now, Leysa is young and "cun", now for you non-Melayus our there, it is pronounced "choon", rhyming with boon. It means she's a doll. At least that's what I think it means. That is not the reason I am a pelajar tegar. I swear. Just like the song. How "cun"? Like Liza Minelli without the overbite. That's how "cun" she is. Comel, trust me.....

All through the "u minya nyiest" and "u tebya nyiest", she is patient. After the second month, she could not understand how we could be so so benak.

"My previous group of students especially Azwari and Kamal were very good. I don't know what is wrong with the four of you."

She means Mior, Hafiz, Maharip and me. Now you know why I hate Azwari and Kamal. But wei, Leysa wei, I know why they are good. Walking dictionary one maaahhhhh...... I roped in Amin who just reported for duty but he usually chickens out just before each lesson. I like the way she says our name. Of course mine especially.

"Miyooorrrr....."
"Hafffeeeezzzzz........."
"Maharrrreeeeppppp.........."
And of course mine........

I know the basics. The good morning (dobre utra), how are you (kagzilla), fine (normano), good (horasho), bad (plaho), yes (da), no (nyet), not bad (ni ploho), young girl (jarushka), pretty (krasivaya), pretty young girl (krasivaya jarushka), and old lady (babushka). Then there is how much (skolka), where (gde), when (kagda), who (kto) and why (pachimu). One is ajhin, two is dva, three is tri, four is chetierri, five is pietz, six is sheish, seven is siem, eight is vorsiem, nine is jay vit and ten is jay sit. Twenty is dvat nat sat, thirty is trit nat sat but forty is sorok. Wei, macam mana boleh jadi sorok? From chetierri (four) to sorok (forty)? No one has been able to give me a satisfactory answer.

Spasiba is thank you and spasiba balshoi is thank you very much, from the word balshoi. Which means big.

Ah well, I'll practise and surprise Leysa one day. And make her suffer less.

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Of MCC and Jealous Wives

2008-01-15T18:03:00.000+08:00

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A club was born where I’m working at, far far away from home. It’s the MCC – Men’s Cooking Club. For some reason, many of the guys who are usually here with their families are family-less now. Obviously, they are used to their spouses’ better cooking compared to what they could get at the restaurants here and have decided that whatever we can conjure up during the lunch hour is far better than anything that we could get elsewhere. And that is without taking into account the slow service, the surly service and the no service. Now you see why we come up winners even if we end up rice with fried eggs, fried beef, fried chicken or fried fish. Throw in your kicap, whatever cili available, api, merah or hijau, we’ve got a winner. Even the Berahims ready to eat is OK once in a while. Or the perencah, ready to cook. Beggars can’t be choosy.

Then we got creative. Some would cook the night before and heat the food up for lunch the next day. And hey, there’s even leftover for dinner. And after dinner, hey, there’s even leftover for the next day’s lunch!! It still tasted good the next day. Then some got far more creative. They’d wake up at five in the morning to cook for lunch. Tell me, when was the last time you heard a guy waking up at five in the morning to cook lunch for a bunch of other guys? And dinner and lunch the next day?

Then you have Hassan. Now Hassan can come up with fish curry when there seemed to be no fish, chicken masak merah when there is nary a pepper in sight and tom yam kung when there’s no Thai national in the land. Hassan would cook beef soup. Chicken masak asam. You name it.

Lina have heard of Hassan now. But our friend Zaki’s better half puts him in a far superior perspective. After hearing Hassan, Hassan, Hassan and Hassan for about two weeks, she got curious. Hassan knows how to cook dishes that she does not. That was not the Hassan she knew.

“Abang, pandai sangat ke Hassan tu masak bang?”

She is worried.

“Pandaaaaiiiii………………..”

Zaki decided to turn the screw a bit.

That’s a first. Zaki’s wife is not worried about him losing his head over other things, such as fishing, cockfighting or women. She’s got far serious problems.

Hassan.

I found a new drug.

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One Night in Bangkok

2007-12-31T14:22:00.000+08:00

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Four nights actually.

Happiness was waiting to board the plane to meet my loved ones. Even though the flight was a seven hour flight on a plane that has no onboard entertainment whatsoever, I didn't mind. After all, I am going to meet Lina, Nazzim and Sofia. I spent the flight sleeping and later chatting with the German guy next to me - he's on his fourteenh trip to Bangkok, read my lips, empat belas..... he must surely like Thailand. Each trip he'd stay for 2 or three weeks in Bangkok, Pattaya and Chiengmai. I think I know why he loves going there. But can't tell here..... Oh, did I mention that the food onboard is is is........ let's put it this way, my sardine sandwiches would be gourmet compared to that.

Our lives have been topsy turvy since I was transferred and this trip was to make up for me being away. This trip has been my way to make up to them. Sofia will be sitting for her UPSR and Nazzim for his PMR and they will need all the time to prepare. After those exams are over with, it's time for another trip I suppose. I wonder where should we go next....

I was like Santa Claus those five days. They pretty much got everything that they wanted. Thank God most of the things they wanted were trinkets. Most..... One omnipotent characteristic of our trips anywhere was getting things for folks back home. Years ago, we always thought that each trip would be the last time that we'd be getting things for people back home. We say it each and every time we were away. Then we found out that we simply could not come home empty handed, we simply don't have the stomach to do that. Tak sampai hati. So here we are a decade later, still doing it. But we are happy remembering the people whom we should and care and what goes around does comes around for we have had our share of souvenirs when other people goes atravelling.

And of course, all good things must come to an end. My journey back here was a lonely sombre one. They left Bangkok about an hour before I did. The lousy food aboard didn't help. About the only solace was that the flight was not full, like at some other times when it was full of people returning to Moscow, transitting at where I'd get off. And so I slept and slept and slept and slept..... On the other hand, I had a bag full of goodies, Maggi mee, Berahim ready to eat and lots and lots of Granola bars that should keep me happy for the next few weeks.

Well, another three weeks before I have (key word - have) to attend a forum back home. If K. C. Kasem taught Americans how to count backwards from forty, I can surely count backwards from twenty-one. Life could be good at times.

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Aidil Adha and The Black King

2007-12-22T19:41:00.000+08:00

Besim, the butcher's son...

Islam, the butcher's apprentice, with Arslan the butcher working on the kurban...

Garahan - Black King, of thge local Alabai breed. Yes, the butcher rear dogs.

It has been a long since I am away from the family during any festive season. Well, this year’s Hari Raya Qurban was celebrated far away from the family.

I try not to think about it because thinking about it will make me think about it and thinking about it is no good since I could not do anything about it. Well, that was a mouthful. Someone has to mind the shop. I do have a guy who just recently reported for duty but since he is new to the area, it might be wise not to let him be here alone. He seems OK and able to handle himself here. And there is the other thing about my boss saying that I must get that lifting agreement that was supposed to expire at the end of this month, be renewed. Great……

Anyway, early morning Aidil Adha found me walking to the masjid, which is about ten minutes away. One thing about this place is that everything is short. The solat terawihs were short. The khutbahs are short. The solat Aidil Adha was short. Right after the solat, we went to the office for our makan-makan. Heavenly, the ones who have their spouses with them here brought nasi himpit, kuah kacang, beef rending, roti jala and we who are singles here brought nada. Our peruts maybe.

Then we went to the house of Arslan the Butcher to kurban 3 cows and 3 sheep.
Well, I think I leave the photos to do the talking……

Makan Jambu*

2007-12-15T13:53:00.000+08:00

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I got my luggage back - 2 weeks later minus my Levi's 501.

Aku sumpah Pak Arab atau Bangla mana yang ambik tu biar berulat badan dia bila dia pakai.

Why Pak Arab? Because it was traced to Cairo and Dubai.

Why Bangla? Because you simply could not imagine how many of them are in the middle east. I was at the Abu Dhabi aiport and having to go through the metal detector, I put my phones, watch, coins, lighter and pen (genuine fake original gold pen) in a plastic tray and this Bangla who was attending the machine picked up my pen, held it in his palm, jiggled it, like when most people do when they want to feel how heavy, thus maybe how valuable something is. It didn't matter to him that I was right in front of him, he just wanted to see if that pen is valuable or otherwise..... He did not look left or right, he was just interested in my pen.

"Ya alah, mangkuk ni, depan mata aku pun engkau berani buat!!!!!"

Aiyo, the gall of some people... tak malu, tak beradab betul separuh orang ni.

And minus the roti canai instant. But that, I don't mind lah, if someone is desperate enough to eat something that does not belong to you, tak dapek den buek apo-apo.....

At least my seluar banyak poket tu selamat....

And, boleh tak somebody tu registerkan I dalam Facebook so that I boleh tengok gambar-gambar. Bolehlah.......

P.S. *Makan Jambu is part of a cuss word of our local origin, concocted a long time ago, used by a few people.

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Here and There

2007-12-04T23:06:00.000+08:00

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No one has ever told me that I should not use fish curry for beef, especially not Lina, she’d probably just say “Papa ni…..” and just shake her head. Beef in fish curry tastes nice too. I just don’t feel like working through the cuttlefish or the prawns that I got a few weeks ago.

It snowed for the first time last Thursday. I woke up, got ready for work, went downstairs to catch the transport and the apartment security guard, Kakajan, pointed excitedly outside while saying “sniek”, “snack” or whatever is the local word for snow. True enough, it was snowing. It wasn’t much, maybe 2 inches but it was enough to cover everything in a white sheet. The mountain south of the city was almost totally covered by snow, last week only the peaks were white. But then, later in the day, the sun came out and al the glorious snow was reduced to mucky mud. No clean cars that day sir. It was just enough snow to later melt and form the perfect concoction to cake all cars with a grayish beige muck. Hooray….. Surprisingly, there were still clumps of snow when we played football on Saturday, right in the middle of the pitch. Well, imagine playing soccer with a few clumps of snow the size of washing machines around.

Oh, I’ll be coming home for a meeting on Friday. This time I’ll just be home for a few days and I’m not taking any chances by being too long from work. The last thing I need is someone to say that there is no one available in town from the department. They have had their fun and I’m going to make sure that I’ll be able to deny them that pleasure in the future, forever.

On a more pathetic note, my luggage from my last trip home is still lost. And not lost in France, as the song goes. The last they traced it was it was in Cairo, routed from Bangkok and on its way to Dubai. That was 5 days ago. Why and how it got to Cairo, only God knows. Now, if anyone has seen a large Polo hard-shell luggage (designated Type 02 by the IATA baggage classification chart), dark blue in colour, with two pink straps around it, please detour it my way. The contents are mostly food, lots of Maggi noodles, Berahim ready to eat stuff, cornflakes, granola bars, instant roti canai and my toiletries. The instant roti canai are gone I presume, I don’t care about the food but my 501’s, 2 light jackets, my ice hockey jersey, my Liverpool jersey, my football socks and other shirts and pants that I like were in that bag………….. Great, that’s the third time I’ve lost my luggage in 5 months. The next time I check in a luggage, I’ll put a so many tags complete with the travel itinerary all over the bag so that if it ever strays, they will only have to read one of the probably twenty-five tags on the bag.

I’m looking forward to seeing Lina and the children later this week and later this month too when all of us take a jaunt in Bangkok. I’ll fly there from where I am and they’ll do likewise from home. This is the only time that I have away from work during this school holidays. And next year will be exam year for both Nazzim and Sofia. I’ll miss celebrating Aidil Adha at home and I’ll miss Aina’s wedding. I’m going to miss a lot of things over the next few years……..

It’s getting colder and colder and colder as the days go by. The mornings are usually foggy. The weeks are seemingly shorter – I don’t know when I could go to the supply base, the training centre and the terminal. I wonder if we could go by road…… it’s a 500 km trip but I’m never one who shy away from such an adventure. I wonder if I could get away with it……

P.S. I’m no Liverpool fan but the jersey was really comfortable.

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Dinner and Pieces

2007-11-21T01:17:00.000+08:00

Ye Caspian Sea

Yes, we still play football even though it is 8 deg C...

Iran is just on the other side of the mountains...

I'm very upset that I will miss the alumni dinner this year. It will be on 1st December and since I will be leaving on 25th November to go back to work, there is no possibility that I will be in town then.

What I wish for is a photo. You know who you are - I want a photo of the two of you. Or the three of you. The four of you, I'm not choosy. How I wish I could be there. OK, the photo, please.....

I have a few more days before I go back. My next trip home which is already in the bag is in January. Somehow, I kinda cherish the chance to sit down longer and do more work. I have not been there long enough. But at the same time, thinking about going back makes me miss Lina, Nazzim and Sofia. About the best solace that I could get while I am over there, missing my family, is that there are a few others like me. Shahimi, Mior, Captain Ahmad, to name a few. Thinking that they must miss their family as much as I miss mine do help. If they can rough it out, so can I. But boy, they sure do cover their feelings well.

Aina, a niece of mine, is getting married on 15th December but I could not make it back home because of work. Nazzim and Sofia will be taking the PMR and UPSR respectively next year and about the only time we have before they start school is around the last week of December. Lina will have to do everything herself. I'm not there to take half of the tasks on the first day of school like we have been doing these last seven years. Life is cruel sometimes.

The best thing about going away is that we get come back. Happiness is when you board a plane on the way home, even though it will be 19, 24 or 32 hours with stops at God knows where before you see your loved ones. It would be wonderful if I am packed with goodies but at times I am not. Read Nazzim, "Papa, bring us something other than chocolates only tau?" That one time I came back laden with gifts for everyone, my luggage had to go walkabout for four days. That luggage was laden with two handbags, three Clark shoes, a Clark pouch and a host of other goodies. I knew I was a winner when Lina liked the handbags and she actually is using one now. About the only thing was "Uh, you bought both in black?" Silly me..... Ah well, you lose some, you win some.

I need to get some sleep for this whatever seminar or conference tomorrow. The family is here with me, for this somewhat impromptu unplanned but we'll take whatever we can under the current circumstances holiday.

Where I'm At

2007-11-11T15:58:00.000+08:00

This photo is a test. A picture of people, OK,OK, women going to the Tulkuchka market, the second biggest open market in the world. Don't ask about the biggest, no one has been able to tell me that.

Been back for Raya, been back to work and going home again for work. Moved into the apartment and that's a relief. I could not take the hotel anymore. At least now I could cook Maggi in my own kitchen. The apartment is nice. Two rooms, two bathrooms and a gorgeous view of the city. And for the first time in 21 years, I cooked!!! I'm still alive, ain't I?

The only thing to do when I am away from Lina and the children is to bury myself in my work. And work expands the time allocated to it. It is a different life when you do not have anyone waiting for you to come home from work. No messages from Lina or Sofia or even Nazzim at times asking me will I be late or otherwise. Lunch is usually at the few places where someone decides to go. About the only thing to look forward to is the soccer matches each Saturday, before the weather gets really cold, the pool games Friday night the yet tobe reactivated bowling sessions, at a shorter alley. Uneven too, they said. But beggars can't be choosy. Well, there are things to look see at night but some things in live will have to change. There are some things that you could just dip the end of your pinky istead of sinking your whole arm. It is getting cold. Brrrr..... I made the mistake of spending a few minutes outside without a sweater or a jacket and paid the price. I'm still sniffling. Iwent up the trail up the mountain which borders Iran. Last Tuesday it was at our supply base on the shores of the Caspian Sea. Yes, with places with names like Neka, Makachkala, Balkanabad and Baku. The hotel was supposed to be the best there but it was bare. Ah well, I got a good reception at the training centre and the supply base and a dinner of lamb curry with 8 other countrymen was simply simply great. Trust me, when living alone in a foreign and relatively unknown (where are you going?), each and every chance to interact is to be cherished.

Good to be going home but somehow I feel guilty about leaving work for two weeks. The internet helps. Well, Let's enjoy home.

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Terawih Haven

2007-10-06T14:23:00.000+08:00

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I went for my first solat terawih here two nights ago and let me tell you, it was an experience. I was warned about it by my colleagues here but you got to do it to believe it.

The niat, the takbir ratul ikram (I hope I got that right) was OK and then the M16 started to kick in. Rat-tat-tat-tat.........tat-tat-tat..... No, no one was shooting any automatic rifle, it was only the imam reading the Al-fatihah aloud. I was like, huh? Tak sempat nak buat apa-apa dah rukuk already huh? The duduk antara dua sujud was like "Rabbil..." and they all sujud again. Aiyo.....

"Wei, wait for me!!!"

Ha ha......It seemed that, my friend told me la, they all here the imam only baca semua, the makmum ikut aja. Or something like that lah. And we completed the 20 rakaats of terawih and 3 of witir in slightly more than 30 minutes. Back home, we did the 8 and 3 in 45 minutes. That's like four times faster, I love this place, ha ha...... I tell you la, if Imam Flash here were to lead the terawih prayers back home, the masjids would be filled to the brim, maybe the car parks too. They'd love hime back home. It is interesting to see how other people practise our common religion. It has started getting colder here, it's the low teens degrees Celcius at night and the masjid is not heated yet I think and a good sweater is needed. Back home I have a hard time struggling not to sweat.... Brrrrr......

Ah well, selamat the last few days of puasa and I'm coming home I've done my time, he he he he...... Well, not all of my time.

My boss - "See who is available on 8 October until the 21st. I'm going to be away on leave... Just make sure someone is here to mind the store...."

Me - "Uh, the two guys Hassan and Jamal will be here, they are not going back for Raya....."

Boss man - "Ya, OK....."

Moi - "Uh, how about me boss, you want me to be here?"

Numero Uno - "Uh, up to you lah, since you just came you might want to go back to straighten a thing or two before you come back again. I leave that to you..."

Oh man, I like that guy already, life is so goooooooood........ Well, for now at least....

So, Thursday, 11 October 2007 will be the bestest day in the whole of 2007 for at 6.30 am I will be back home for Hari Raya Aidil Fitri.... I wouldn't have it any other way. Like I said, I'm coming home I've done my time, well, not all of it...... Make sure the rendang and ketupat and whatever bestest heavenly food there is be ready for me. God, 2 weeks of mostly eating out here and sahur of maggi and bread (thank goodness for the ikan bilis goreng berlada and serunding) at the hotel has given me religion. I want real food!!!

OK....

Selamat.......
Hari Raya
Kepada saudara serta saudari......

Uh, main the lagu anak rantau please.....

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The New Place

2007-09-30T13:41:00.000+08:00

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I finally got that piece of paper I was waiting for on Monday, 24 September 2007. There being no flight out on Tuesday night, I had to opt for one on Wednesday morning, at 9.00 am, through Istanbul. Cleared my table as best as I could Tuesday evening, said my goodbyes to the folks at the office. That night the gang decided to give me a short farewell at McDonald's near my house. I had to oblige, so nice of them. But I had to leave after an hour or so - I have not finished packing. I never do, not until the very last minute. (True enough, I left behind my spare glasses, the Kaabah direction finder and a pouch that I very much wanted to bring). I finished packing after sahur - all 47 kg of my stuff. That was what the weighing machine read when I checked in.

"Please please Miss check-in counter lady, please do not look at the bright red numbers. Just look at my face and my my, have anyone ever told you that you have lovely teeth and not to mention your lovely lovely eyes......."

I got away scot free....

Then it was a blur of buying Minyak Cap Kapak, immigrations, the short ride to terminal C, some duty free shopping and the lounge to raid MAS' delicious kacang and tomato juice.

The flight to Istanbul was 10 hours 40 minutes and I probably slept for about 2 hours. The rest of the time I spent reading, watching some movies and thinking. Then it was a 7-your wait at Istanbul. Then another three and a half hour flight. I arrived there at 2.30 am, was in the hotel by 4.30 am, took a shower, tried to go to sleep, got about an hour's worth before I couldn't sleep anymore, watched some TV and was at the office by 9 am local time.

This place is something else, it is kinda beautiful in a weird sense, not in the usual sense. It's like Putrajaya being located just next to KL. Wide avenues, collossal buildings lining up one after another. Office buildings, apartments. And in the background, the mountains and beyond the mountains, Iran. Wide roads. Not many cars. Safe like crazy, no robberies or snatch thieves or whatever. Can't walk in town after 11 pm though, but it's OK to be travelling by car at that time. The weather is a lovely 18 degrees C. A bit colder at night. Food ada masa-elah sikit. Dia sini Islam tapi puasa tak, solat tak, most ayam and lembu hentah sembelih atau tak and ehem ehem, kerbau pendek is eaten by some of them. Pandai pandai lah. I have been jemputed to berbuka puasa rumah orang 2 kali dah - you back home, trust me, count yourselves lucky with all the food and pasar ramadan there. And my sahur this morning was maggi asam laksa, a bun eaten with ikan bilis goreng berlada, coffee and a banana. Yummm.... Lina doesn't know my sahur menu. The hotel food here is only good for the first meal, after that not sedap anymore. Plus the fact yang you tak tau the ayam and lembu is sembelih or accident punya plus ada kerbau pendek in the hotel menu. But, iftar today, at rumah budak bujang. I will bawa the ikan bilis goreng berlada that my sister gave me and the serunding that Lina made for me. Sedaaaappp..... And just a minor teeny weenie afterthought, the girls here are alamak pengsan lah aku banyaknya yang cantik nak mampus.

I took a look at a few apartments and all are nice and I will be having a hard time choosing one. So the space is available to whoever is coming, you know who you are. Lina, Nazzim and Sofia are planning to come at the end of next year, after the exams and when it's snowing here. They asked me to take a look at another apartment near "Disneyland" a theme park built by the government but it is a bit further and I don't want to stay near "Disneyland". It is not Disneyland but that's what the locals call it.

I miss them. I miss Lina, I miss Nazzim and I miss Sofia. I spoke to them this morning and they were on their to Masjid India, to buy some stuff for Nazzim.

"Well, I have to do it sendiri now, kalau tak dulu we'd do it together. Now I have to do it myself."

Kesian my sweetheart tu. Any of you reading this, just call your spouses and children and ask them to stand still for about a minute and just look at them. Just look at them. Trust me, the very prospect of not knowing when you will be seeing them next, whether it is in two weeks or or two months is not a palatable notion.

Well, a man's got to do what a man's got to do. To all, Selamat Berpuasa ......

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Intermission

2007-09-21T15:53:00.000+08:00

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Starry starry night....

The photo above personifies one thing - things that I wish I could do and have done more. That is somewhere at Taman Tasik Permaisuri on the morning of Sunday, 3rd September 2006. I know, the date says it's the next day but the camera was wrong. I am right. And what's more, that was a few days before we got to know that Nazzim will be going off to boarding school.

I am simply tired. I am trying to tie off loose ends so that I could leave and take up my new assignment. Then it dawned on me that things at this end of the line will never ever end, taper off or stop so I might as well use up all the strings that I have, tie off as much as I could and when there is a slight pause, jump on to the next ship.....

I am tired of becoming a VU graph engineer. I am tired of being told my presentation materials are dry and do not have enough meat. I don't care, I do not want to attend a 1 week course that teaches you to prepare stunning VU graphs.

Thay have courses like that?????!!!??

It seemed that they do. It seemed that you could be the lousiest anything in the world but if you could do the most amazing presentation materials, people, especially the bosses would simply love you and give you an all encompassing title - planner.

I have been declining invitations, well, 3 actually, not that I have to fight off a swarm of owls (read Harry Pottah) but the one time I berbuka outside, I felt so lonely without Lina, Nazzim and Sofia. That's it, eat at home all the time. And oh, Nazzim is enjoying his time sick at home, well, not enjoying that much because he has been sick and he was quite listless until Wednesday night after which I went to see my mother and brother, consulted with them, gave them some pengeras each, went home, got hold of Nazzim, "kus semangat etc. etc." and asapkan dia kemenyan and kelilingkan dia kemenyan and lo and behold, he was a much chirpier version of one of the dwarfs (remember? Grumpy? the grumpy part, not the short part) yesterday. Whatever it takes.

I need a new drug...

Ye Eternal List

2007-08-30T11:58:00.000+08:00

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I have listed down things to do before I go :

Handover Note.

Notify change of address for banks, credit cards etc. from office to home.

Email friends that I'll be away for a few years.

Send sms'es to others that I'll be way for a few years.

Handover Note.

Buy a new phone for myself and Sofia.

Handover Note.

Tell my dad I'm going.

Plan for the small kenduri doa selamat and kesyukuran.

Apply for some advance.

Buy a laptop.

Buy a new printer for home.

Buy new phones for myself and Sofia.

Buy a big luggage bag to replace the one busted in June.

Write thank you notes to the people who approved my transfer.

Handover Note.

Empty my workstation.

Delete some files from the office laptop that I am using now.

Pay the children's educational insurance before I go.

Pay the club membership till the end of this year.

Apply for the tickets.

Arrange for someone to pick me up at the airport. After all, I am arriving at 12.10 am.

Get someone to book a hotel room for me.

Get someone to pick me up the next day to go to the office.

Draw up a list of things to buy and bring with me.

Make Lina drive the Hilux.

Service the aircon.

My my, will I go at all with all the things to do?

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Simpang Lima Reunion

2007-08-08T09:44:00.000+08:00

Mr. Wong trying to get everyone to sit still before the pictures are taken.

Two Sundays ago, I went to my primary school reunion. Yes, my primary school. There weren’t many of us, eleven of us showed up. That’s not bad considering that we only could contact about twenty-three of our friends.

To make matters a bit lopsided, ten teachers showed up. Mrs. Ng, my Standard 2 teacher and Miss Nages (then Miss), my Standard 5 teacher was there. I wonder what happened to Miss D’Cruz (Standard 1) and Miss M. Losam (Standard 3). Mr Ngoh (Standard 4 and Standard 6) has migrated to Australia. But his nephew Alex was there and he promised to inform us should Mr. Ngoh comes back to Malaysia for whatever reason.

There was Mr. Jeyaraman, who was the headmaster, Miss Maheswari, Miss Tan, Mrs. Ng, Madam Ee, Mr. Richard Samy, Mrs. Ong and Mr. Wong. Mr. Wong is also the father on Chin Hee, who passed away while he was in Form 1, from a brain tumor, if I got that right. Mr. Jeyaraman looked pretty much like he was then, except that he was a bit thinner and some grey hairs were evident. Most of us are larger than the teachers, hahahaha.....

I haven’t seen Alex, Peng Hwee, Arumugam and Meng Wah since we left school. I know Alex is a commercial pilot. Meng Wah is working in one of the big private firms in KL and Peng Hwee has a successful real estate business but I did not have the chance to speak to Arumugam. But then whatever we are doing for a living, to each his own, it does not matter.

I mentioned that Miss Nages have the distinction of being the teacher who presided over the only word I ever got wrong in spelling in primary school. The word was “tomorrow “ and I wrote it as “tomorow”. To this day, I am gently reminded of her each and every time I use that word. It was good to see the teachers again.

That school was out of the way from where I lived but my brother went to that school so I guessed that was why I did too. We lived on the other side of the river and it was quite a distance away. The monthly bus pass with the KL Kelang and Port Swettenham Bus co. costs RM 3 then. If I were in the morning session, I’d reach home at about 2.30 pm and that was that. There were no tuitions nor music lessons nor anything else. If I were in the evening session, I’d reach home at about 7.30 pm, after the bus had dropped the kids off at Kampung Jawa, Connaught Bridge Power Station and Johnsen. Then that was that too, no tuitions nor music lessons nor anything else.

School was very uncomplicated then.

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Sofia I In D Minor

2007-07-18T12:38:00.000+08:00

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Sofia is practising “Can’t Take My Eyes Off Of You” on the piano. She is performing at a concert next month, on the 18th of August 2007. I love that song. She is still stumbling a bit through it now but she is getting better everyday.

“Adik, bila adik dah boleh main lagu tu smoothly, Adik play and Papa sing nak?”

“Huh? Papa sing? Papa tau nyanyi ke? Papa tau ke lagu tu?”

“What do you mean papa tau nyanyi ke? Of course Papa tau, tell me, who was the one singing that lullaby Hamsai Tu Bada to you….. when you wanted to go to sleep masa kecik2 dulu?“

Oh my Zod, she has no idea. No idea at all. Heh heh heh…. Nyanyi suke suke aje boleh lah…. I told her to practice hard, she wouldn’t want to fumble during the concert, does she? She might have to perform without the notes, she might have to play from memory. That makes it harder still.

Now that both her and Nazzim are grown up, I wonder if I remember that lullaby anymore. Well, I still do. When they were younger, both of them went to sleep listening to that lullaby. My mother taught me. I guess probably I went to sleep listening to that lullaby too.

But then Sofia has got a bigger problem than memorizing her notes or playing well. You see, she is “gemuruh”. While waiting for her first music exams a few years ago, I saw for the first time how bad it was for her. She felt like throwing up. She was so nervous that she felt like throwing up!!! So I told her that she had practiced and studied and that’s all there is to it.

“Adik takut fail….”

“Kalau fail apa nak buatkan, fail lah…”

“Tapi Papa dah bayar fees dia…, mahal kan?”

Ya, it was like RM 200 or something like that….

“Apa nak buatkan, tapi that is why Papa suruh Adik practice and study and practice and study, then mesti tak fail.”

“Kalau fail jugak?”

“No, you won’t fail.”

“Kalau?”

“No, I won’t be angry with you, I promise……”

Actually, those were the words she wanted to hear.

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Terimalah Cigku......

2007-07-06T10:46:00.000+08:00

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"Terimalah gambar2 ni cikgu. Emak saya dah marah2 dah asyik ulang kerja ni. Bapa saya dah mengamuk-ngamuk dah. Terimalah cikgu...."

That was what Nazzim told his teacher when he handed in his homework to his teacher recently. It had something to do with him taking photos of positions of him sitting down, arrangements of cutlery in "makan beradat", something in Kajian Tempatan or something like that.

Lina said he was laughing when he told her that and I guessed it worked, the teacher accepted his work. Ah well, he caught me at going through bad times when he had to re-shoot the photos for the third and fourth time.

Well, I never had to use a camera for my homework. Ah well, how thing change.....

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Back in Town

2007-06-09T23:09:00.000+08:00

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In Edinburgh, that is. It is tiring when it's somewhere for a week or two, back to the office for a week, away for another week, then back to the office for a week, then away for another week. Story of my life for the last 2 months... The lousiest thing about this trip is that it's during the school holidays. When Nazzim goes back to his school on Sunday, I won't be around. Lina has to handle everything.

Lina got it nearly as bad as her mom, being left behind by their spouses that is. She thought marrying someone not from the armed forces would change things but no such luck. Once when we were posted out of the country, I was away offshore for a total of forty days, she handled Nazzim and Sofia alone. Nazzim was nearly four and Sofia was nearly two then. Everyday when she walked around our housing compound, my officemates' wives would ask her if I am back and when they found out that I was still out at sea, they'd just shake their heads.

Ah well, I really got her something this time.

Please please please make her like it.

Like them like them, I got her more than one...... Just want to make sure ma...

I think she will.

The flight to Amsterdam was kinda routine. I watched 3 movies, slept maybe for 2 hours and hassled the stewardess. She was bored, so I asked for stuff to nibble on. This time I felt the jet lag. Only last night was I able to sleep and not wake up at 4 in the morning. I woke up at 5 in the morning instead. Went to Glasgow today to do some shopping and got Nazzim a pair of Clarks. If he doesn't like them, I'll have them, thank you. That's why they are in my size. His feet are a bit smaller than mine but with thick socks, he can wear my shoes. Maybe he'll like them, Maybe he won't....... I got Sofia a Clarks satchel. She'll like them. She likes everything I bring her. I still have tomorrow to figure out what to do in Edinburgh. Maybe I'll go to Dundee.

Ah well, this Monday there'll be another meeting and I'll go to Aberdeen on Monday for another day of meeting and visiting some people there. I'll leave here Wednesday and be back home by Thursday evening, catch up with a friend who will be leaving the next day, go to work late on Friday and look at the weekend in the face. I've pretty much done my shopping and life is so sweet.

I hope this will be my last trip to Scotland. I think it will be. I wanna go somewhere else....

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Me a Few Monsters in Houston

2007-05-31T14:23:00.001+08:00

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Me in front of a beautiful pick-up truck near the Reliant Centre, Houston. When my Hilux grows up, it wants to be just like that. I think it's a Chevy, maybe all 4,500 cc's of it, I'm not too sure but that's a safe bet. Whatever it is, it is beautiful....

This one is a Hummer. Mean looking huh?

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Speaking The England

2007-05-21T19:20:00.000+08:00

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When I was in Houston earlier this month, one of the guys I was traveling with would speak differently whenever he had to speak to a local. After the first day, I couldn’t take it any more.

“Uh, why did you do that?”

“Did what?”

“Spoke like you did just now?”

“Oh, I was thinking, I should speak like an American when I am talking to them here.”

“Uh, let me tell you, you didn’t sound like an American just now. You sounded like a Malaysian trying to speak English with an American accent. And a bad one at that.”

“No, I think that we should try to speak like they do.”

“Uh, I don’t think so. I don’t think when the English comes here they break out into the local slang. I think they just speak the same way they do, maybe slow it down so that the Americans could figure out what they are saying. Probably the same the other way around too. At least they have the advantage of a similar language.”

But trust me, what came out of his mouth was not English with an American accent, it was plain Malaysian English with a bad American accent. Naik bulu roma gua lorrr…

When speaking to native English speakers, I’d just slow down my speech and speak each word clearly. So far the Americans have been very patient with me and the bulu roma of anyone who is with me tak naik when I try to speak English like an American…. People are inherently patient when they know that we are trying to speak in their native tongue. Fantastic fast Malaysian English could be an earful for the native English speakers. Years ago, I always thought that I ni macam bagus aje speaking the London but I did get tired when I was asked to repeat what I said each time. That made me think and true enough by speaking sebiji sebiji, I almost never was asked to repeat whatever I said.

“Hi - can - I - have - a - cheeseburger - a - small - coke - and - a - large - fries - to - go - please?”

That’s much better than “HicanIhaveacheeseburgerasmallcokeandalargefriestogoplease?”

Honest, every time he breaks out into what he thinks is American English, my bulu roma naik tegak……

I think that unless you could carry the slang perfectly, you should not even try to sound like an American, an Englishman or an Australian. Thousands of our countrymen (and women) spent years studying the States, UK and Australia and very few of them came home with the ability to speak English like the Yanks, Yobs or Aussies. Most would be able to say a few words like them but that’s it. I know that Bonch could carry the Southern twang well. A colleague at my work place speaks English like an American and it was a joy to listen to her because she sounded just like one. My biras could speak the Queen's English like an Englishman when he wants to but most of the time he just spoke plain good English. But then he did spend something like 14 years in the U.K. so that’s no surprise. Most of us would fool around with words like quarter, Manhattan, y’all, barbi etc but few could really carry the foreign accents well. This lidah of mine is sudah the lama cakap Malaysian English and dua tiga tahun duduk negeri orang will not change the way it curls and whirls.

Well, g’day mate…

That one I berani cakap, easy one meh……

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Hoosten...

2007-05-02T04:30:00.000+08:00

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Hi there y'all, den ado kek Houston ni.....

I got to know at 3 pm on Friday that I'll be flying off the next day. Great, do that to me one more time, once is never enough with folks like you....

Tell you one thing, a 16 hour flight is no fun but that is what it takes from Bangkok to L.A. then it was a 5 hour wait at L.A. for another 2 and a half hour flight to Houston. I finally check in the hotel 32 hours after I left home.

You should see the pick-up trucks here. Even the silly Pontiac that we rented has a 3,800 cc engine. The Americans love their cars.

Gonna get me some food at Sheik's Chilli tonight. I missed my niece's Aina's bertunang, I missed the long holiday that we had because of Labour Day and Wesak day and I miss teh tarik and rice. God, I miss a lot of things, don't I, makes you wonder why I' do any travelling then.

Nak balik, nak balik!!!! Nanti dulu, enjoy sini dulu. Colorado kan ada?

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An Akad, PMTJ and Wheels

2007-04-13T11:26:00.000+08:00

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I went to Lina’s aunt akad nikah ceremony last night. When the spokesman for the to be groom’s party spoke up and introduced himself and his posse, it was a familiar name to me. As she was inside the house and I was sitting in the tent outside, I texted her.

“Ma, recognized the voice?”

I couldn’t place the voice even if my life depended on it and I am sure Lina doesn’t too but what the heck.

“No, y?”

“Tu yang tengah cakap tu is (the man’s name), pak mertua tak jadi u…”

A long pause.

“Oh ya, I see him now, didn’t expect to see him here tonite.”

“Y, excited ke?”

“Huh? Apa u cakap ni…?”

That was that. Tomorrow night, it’s at Mandarin Oriental. Sofia is upset since they do not make any provisions for children. Lina’s parents have a room at the hotel tomorrow night but she is not comfortable of leaving Sofia alone in a hotel room. Sofia does not know about it. I’m not telling her, for I’ll just caught in between the two of them. We have to park her at my sister’s house. I’ll bribe my niece Aina to keep her occupied and happy there. Ah well…….

The Hilux is just lovely. You are high up there and can look down at everyone else, except when a real truck or and express bus comes along. Then I kalah lah…. About the only thing is that since it has a long and wide wheelbase, with leaf springs at the back, it does groan and moan a bit when the road is a bit bumpy due to the long and big body being twisted and torqued. A friend assured that some replacement shock absorbers from Old Man Emu could vastly improve that. At a cost of about RM 1,700. Uh, I’ll live with the groans and moans a while longer then. But on the highways, it’s something else. Last week, I was on the rightmost lane, enjoying the drive, overtaking a car when another car came from behind and flashed it’s lights at me. Mr. Impatience Personified (Mr. IP) himself is on the road. And he is behind me. And I am in his way. And he needs to get past me. So I did the only thing sensible to do at that time, at that place and in that situation. I floored the gas. Now, even though the Hilux weighs 1860 kg (well, 1997 kg with me and the flatbed cover plus the junk I have in the car), a 2,500 cc turbocharged diesel engine can do wonders when called upon. No, it cannot do 270 km/hr but whatever it was that night, it was good enough to say goodbye, a real honest teary-eyed goodbye to Mr. IP. I later slowed down and waited for Mr. IP to come by but he never did. Either he discovered religion, went into a ditch or was teleported away by aliens. And oh, those who know me, knows that I do not drive like a maniac. Part maniacal driving sometimes maybe, sometimes, but not a full-throttled maniac. In my three weeks in using the Hilux, I have yet to intimidate any other driver, and I intend to keep it that way. I have a good reason for that, for almost all the time, I am training two future drivers.

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Jonah, Jason, Francois and My New Toy

2007-04-07T12:22:00.001+08:00

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Last Tuesday I went to a charity dinner at Shangrila. The guests of honor were Jonah Lomu (I don't have to elaborate on who is he), Jason Leonard (only the most capped English international, 123 caps under his belt) and Francois Pienaar (the captain of the Springboks who won the 1995 Rugby World Cup).

Lomu was as big as I thought he'd be. I guess the sight of him coming full speed towards you could give you nightmares. Ask Mike Catt, he'd know. As for Leonard, imagine having a barrel for a chest. In Francois Pienaar, how about a slightly smaller but higher barrel. All three are good public speakers, with Pienaar being the best, no disrespect intended for Lomu and Leonard for they both had the audience in stitches too most of the time.

Then there was the charity auction. A ball signed by them went for RM 12,000. An All Black jersey signed by Lomu went for RM 35,000. Another jersey went for the same amount. An England jersey signed by Leonard went for RM 16,000. The expats sure know how to have fun.

Jonah Lomu signing Jaime's shirt while Chris looks on, wonder at whom?

Jason Leonard, Jonah Lomu, a fan and Francois Pienaar.

A rugby ball made of white chocolate. Yum....

That there is dessert. Goalpost, a rugby ball half a pitch, all made of ice cream...

And oh, this is my new Hilux.... Sofia loves it. Nazzim loves it. Lina thinks it's OK. I love it.

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Yes and No

2007-03-26T15:19:00.000+08:00

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Lina : Go ahead and buy it if I want to. I don't mind.

Nazzim and Sofia : Yes!!!

Pang Ang : Why? Get something more executive.

J Underwood : Gooooood, aku kata bagus.

My Former Boss : You go ahead, I'm using one already.

Fay : It's OK apa...my dad ada?

Mr. Solar : You should bro.......

Long John : Get something more executive and prestigious.

Others : I hope he won't do it..

What are they talking about....?

Heh heh..... Red tau.....

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Awkward Moments

2007-03-20T16:08:00.000+08:00

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I was among the first to arrive for lunch. I played well but I wasn’t entertaining any thoughts of winning anything. Maybe the lucky draw. Us backpeddlars always look forward to the lucky draw.

I saw him first. At least I think I saw him first. He came from the back, walked past me and was walking away from me. I still remember that gait.

Shoot, he plays golf? We were pretty even at rugby by my dummies were better than him, his were non-existent. I wonder if he's better than me at golf.

Then he turned. Then he saw me. Did he see me when he was walking from the back, pretending not to see me, turned around and pretending only to se me then? Maybe not, I have changed quite a bit over the years. I’ll give him the benefit of the doubt. You very rarely do that to your nemesis. Always thinking that they are so cunning, twisted and manipulative.

Should I smile, should I smile or what?

I smiled.

He did too. Thank goodness he did too.

He’s coming to my table. Why is he coming to my table? I’m sitting down, he’ll have an advantage over me. I’m sitting down. He’s right next to me. It’s OK, if he tries anything funny, I could knee him where it hurts.

Should I say something first?

He said hi. I said hi. Well, I did smile first and it’s only fair for him to speak first. We changed the standard pleasantries of two people who have not seen each other in a long time.

Him is someone from the past. A long time ago, nearly twenty years or so ago. We were vying for the attention of someone else. Well, he was her ex and I was her current. Then. You know how complicated situations of exes and currents could be. He looked good, put on a few pounds, like me, maybe less. That hair, that smile, that gait. That laid back gait. All were still there. She used to hate that gait. She used to love it before that though.

Neither of us mentioned her. I know that she have not met him in about nineteen years. She told me that herself.

And oh, I didn’t win anything that day. I even bombed out on the lucky draw.

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Mr. Ngoh's Lads

2007-03-14T18:18:00.001+08:00

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This is a photo of my Standard 4 class in SRJK Inggeris (II), Simpang Lima, Kelang, when Simpang Lima was a much quieter part of Kelang, unlike what it is now. It was still surrounded by palm estates then, that is where the housing area Palm Garden got its name. It was an all boys school. It didn't matter much to us then, I guess when you are ten years old, girls do not matter much. There were two classes in each year, classes A and B. We were in Standard 4A. In Standard 4, the Standard 6 guys looked terribly clever, brave and grown up to us.

In the photo is Mr. Ngoh, my friends Ariffin, Wahab, Rauf a.k.a. Debok, Alias a.k.a. Cendol, Badrul, Khairi, Shanmugan, Tamilaresan, Kesava, Muhammad and the list goes on and on. Mr. Ngoh is a kids' dream teacher. He was stern but kind, taught us well and allowed us to play rugby during PE. Three of them in the photo, Zukiman, Owen and Bensy joined the class that year. In Zukiman we had our Pele, in Owen we had our Gordon Banks and in Bensy we had, well, Bensy.

To the left of Mr. Ngoh is Chin Hee, with Shamsuddin next to him. They were always together. For six years, they were always together. Badrul used to make fun of them being together during class, PE and recess. Manaf is sitting to the right of Mr. Ngoh. I was the class monitor for that year and when Mr. Ngoh became our class teacher again in Standard 6, I became the monitor, again. Becoming the monitor was a big thing then. Whenever the teacher is not around, you get to sit at his desk and write down the names on the blackboard of those who make too much noise, then negotiate with them on what will it take to get their names off the list and get to thump our resident gangsters.

At least three have passed on, Chin Hee, Khair and Manaf. I still talk to Wahab, Zukiman, Khairi, Debok frequently, while I have met Jayaraj, Seerajuddin, Tirath and Rajinder these last few years. For a few years I thought it was Khairi who had passed away until I met him one day and said that I was surprised to see him alive. He thumped me on the head. I got my Khair and Khairi mixed up.

I heard Mr Ngoh migrated to Australia, though I am not sure of it but I can always ask Alex, his nephew. Alex is sitting in the same row as I am but third from left, between Owen and Zukiman.

How I wish for those carefree days....

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Leaving the Nest.....

2007-01-26T16:28:00.000+08:00

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Well, sort of…..

When Nazzim left for boarding school late last year, our lives changed a bit. Whether we like it or admit it or otherwise, our schedules revolves around him or his availability or unavailability. We do take into account Sofia’s sentiments. He needed a lot of things each time he comes home and when we buy things for him, we probably have to buy something for Sofia too, even though she does not need it.

He has adjusted superbly into hostel life. No major complains or grouses, only small ones that are part and parcel of hostel life. After the first week of school this year, he came back and asked Lina to teach him how to iron clothes. You got it, some seniors asked him to do that. He does things for the seniors from running errands for them, clean the rooms, do their beds etc. I guess I can only listen to that and not let my paternal instincts take over. Oh, he doesn’t tell me all these things, he only tells Lina because he's afraid I might run riot. But then he also knows that whatever he tells his Mama will find its way to my ears. No, I will not run riot, I’ll let him discover hostel life on his own. But whatever it is, I told him, if anyone assaults him, asks for money or do the nasty to him, he got to tell me for there are limits to everything. Lina was not too pleased when she heard about the juniors’ washing the seniors’ clothes so I volunteered - should any senior ask him to wash their clothes, I’ll go to the school and wash the seniors’ clothes. If I feel a bit melancholic, maybe I’ll let them take them off first. No worries, no one has been scrubbed yet, no clothes washing involved so far.

For a few weeks he averaged spending RM 50 a week. Oh my Zod………

“Makanan kat Dewan Makan (DM) tak sedap la pa…..”

”Uh, I know the food at the DM is no gourmet food but you have to learn to eat there and not head for the canteen every time the food is not to your taste…”

Meaning, bukan lauk ayam lah tu.

“Ya, OK…..”

And that is on top of the supplies that we send him every week or rather, every three or four days, hehehehehehehe. But we finally struck a deal. He will have enough money to spend should the food be tak sedap all the time but he should eat at the DM a bit more. I guess it worked for his spending has came down quite a bit. Whenever he comes home, he sleeps a lot. It figures, at school, he rarely sleeps before midnight and wakes up by 5.30 am.

But he enjoys the school. At the start of the year, him and a few others were called up front during assembly because they scored something like a hundred or something like that in music or something like that, to receive a certificate or something like that and a RM 5 voucher.

“Alah, RM 5 aje….”

“That’s not the point.” I said. “See what could happen when you work hard and do your best? You were not expecting the RM 5 were you and when you got it, it felt rather nice, didn’t it?”

And I rambled on and on and on, oh god…… even I forgot what I ranted on but it was long and lingering. That’s me in my father mode.

Lina later told me that he said he’d like a lot more of those vouchers and certificates.

Go for it, son….

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Merry New Year

2007-01-05T15:51:00.000+08:00

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Another year gone by, another year older. I have a T-shirt that was given to me while I was on Y2K duty. That shirt is seven years old. It’s still good. It’s been seven years since what could have happened. The biblical famine in ancient Egypt would have ended. The bad luck for breaking a mirror would have too.

Sometimes when I sit down with friends, we ended up talking about things that happened ten, fifteen, twenty years ago. Well, not too much of the past for if we keep looking too much at what have happened, we…., we…., we…., well, it is simply pointless to be too nostalgic!!! But memories being what they are, we can’t help it. Spoke about someone with someone (you know who you are!). Well, I reckon that most of us, me and my friends that is, do have the luxury of experience. And I reckon that I agree with the adage that youth is wasted on the young. Well, I guess in many cases the not so young would probably waste it too, should they be given youth again. And probably do it again after that too. Ah, wishful thinking.

Priorities differ with age. For Nazzim and Sofia, their priorities are simply hogging the TV, watching their favorite DVD’s over and over, video games, cousins of similar age, fast food and other things that we parents swear would ruin their lives.

Nazzim is back in boarding school. He has to do things that seniors tell him to do. He seems to enjoy boarding school. He calls home like five times everyday. He prefers that none of us goes up to the hostel with him. He gets less sleep, less time to himself, less TV and lesser quality food but he does not really complain about it. That surprised us a bit. Maybe we being close by helps. Maybe he realizes that he could get closer to his potential there. Maybe. I remember hating going back to school after each holiday. With a passion. Each time we see him, he’d tell us about his friends. They are still a mystery to us as we don’t know who is what, whom or which. Yet.

Sofia, as usual, is finding it difficult to go to school, to do schoolwork, to go mengaji, to do things what she should as a ten-year old. She pleads not getting enough sleep every morning when we wake her up, claims fatigue after coming home from school, which happens to be just before ugama school and professes sleepiness by 9 pm whenever she is doing her schoolwork, which is every night except for Fridays and Saturdays. She gets jealous of anything and everything we get for Nazzim (for his stay at the hostel) and she gets pretty much of what he gets, in some instances, even when she does not need them.

I spoke with an old long lost friend and his wife is pregnant with their sixth child. Yoweeeee..!!! Five going on six! Some people are lucky… I’d be happy with three, four would be nice….. Ah, Nazzim and Sofia would have to suffice then.

New Year’s resolutions? A few, and some are well under way. But resolutions are like promises, many are made to be broken. Yeeccchhhh…..!

May 2007 bring all of us what we need and then some. Maybe not what we want or deserve, just what we need.

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When I Go Away.......

2006-12-20T07:59:00.000+08:00

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Wahid and Nadia and Farah (my anak-anak buah) with Nazzim (in red) and Sofia (in pink) somewhere in between, at The Great Wall.

...I will come back again......

Beijing is cold!!!!! It was cold, fun, funny, hillarious, amazing and incredible. There was Keluarga Beruk and there was Beijing, hahahahahaha....

I'm back but I have to find my breath again (I god a cod....), reality (do I have to get back to work?) and figure out what is the meaning of life....... And oh, spare change, anyone, spare change?

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Ye Fine Aberdonians

2006-12-08T21:02:00.000+08:00

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I was at a bus stop in Aberdeen when I heard, "Uncle, uncle orang Malaysia ke?"

I thought there was a dearth of Malaysians in Aberdeen but right in front of me, there were two of them. Faiz and Jeff. Students. Alamak, uncle, you........ Uncle pun uncle lah. Then it was the usual barrage of questions......

"Bila uncle sampai....?"
"Bercuti ke....?"
"Ada kerja ke...?"
"Bila balik....?"
"Dok mana.....?"

As they were in a hurry to be somewhere, I just managed to tell them the hotel I was staying at and Faiz gave me his phone number.

"Kalau ada apa-apa lah......", that was what he said, if I recalled it correctly.

I was busy the next three days but the day prior to me leaving, I thought I'd give Faiz a call.

"Faiz, ni uncle yang kat town the other day. Uncle just want to tell you that I'll be leaving tomorrow....."

"Oh ye ke? Then uncle come over to our house lah, have dinner with us tonight....."

Ya, why not eh? I was bored and anything is better than watching TV....... I took a bus to town and stopped by a grocery store and got some fruits for dessert. Well, seven apples and seven bananas should be enough for Faiz and his two or three roommates.

Boy, was I wrong. There were more than three of them. More like a dozen.... They were a motley bunch of architecture, medical and business students, studying at the University of Aberdeen and the Robert Gordon University - other than Faiz and Jeff, there was Borhan, Razif, Razi, Big Show (they would not give me his name), Liyana and the girl working for what was Kellogg Brown and Root (but I didn't get her name) and not forgetting Razak and his wife. I have forgotten what it was like being a teenager or a student but throughout dinner, dessert and everything else, them kids were bergurau like mad with each other, everyone asyik gelak aje all the time. Yalah, kutuk mengutuk membawa bahagia kan? I thought I'd be back at the hotel by 10 pm or so for a good night's sleep but it was well after midnight that I finally made that cold trudge back to the hotel. It was a good night.

"Budak-budak Aberdeen baik-baik uncle, tak sombong..."

"Tak macam Melayu London......."

Weeiii, dengar budak-budak London, marah dia orang nanti.......... Gurau aje lah ya?

As I am in an internet cafe (my access to the net at the office has been down since I came back) I'll stick up a photo of them later.

Here's to a fine bunch of Aberdonians. Here's to a fine bunch of young Malaysians.

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Still Lost....

2006-11-29T23:58:00.001+08:00

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Aberdeen is colder than Paris. Never thought that 8 degrees C would be that cold. I'm glad that the meetings are over. I just have one more night before going home. Yahoo. Yahoo. Yahoo. One seasoned traveller I am huh?

The flight from Paris to Aberdeen was on a small Fokker 70. Boy, brought back memories of travelling in those tiny Islanders. You tend to feel every single air pocket, no matter how small.

Anyway, here are more snapshots of Paris... I wonder what gulai is waiting for me when I reach home..... I am so sick of ikan, fish and tabasco....

Me and the Arch de Triomphe....

That thing at La Defense, ha ha.....

A billboard along Rue New York. Why a billboard? I don't know....

Parking the French way.... Them French use their bumpers as they were meant to be used...

De Gaulle's statue at the corner of Robert F. Kennedy and Champs Elysee..

My boss and our minder, out for more foie gras. Hati angsa weh....

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I Was Lost....

2006-11-25T11:24:00.000+08:00

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... in France. In the street a band was playing....

I got to learn to sleep on flights. Virtually not sleeping on a 13-hour flight is not good. Plus if you only have time to check into the hotel at 7 am Paris time and then you are whisked to a meeting.

Wei, some of the letters in the alphabet are located differently on the keyboards here!!! At least I didn't get lost on the Metro like I did the last time I was here.

France is full Frenchmen. Ha...., and Frenchwomen. Lovely actually. The weather is a cool 8 deg C or so, so only a good jacket is required. Caught a thousand glimpses of the Eiffel Tower, went past the Elysee Palace today and took some shots of the Arche de Triomphe last night. Pardon my spelling of those places, my French is terrible. I am sick of poisson, fish that is... Aaah French girls, I must have fallen in love a thousand times these last 3 days..... Gonna get me a good meat or chicken meal tomorrow.

I can't wait to be home....

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Sofia Sofia

2006-11-20T14:04:00.000+08:00

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One day after the Hari Raya holidays, Lina told me that she picked up a smiling, beaming Sofia from school one day.

“Mama, Adik dapat nombor tiga dalam kelas…”, she whispered.

“Really? That’s good, well done!”, said her Mama.

But a few days later, Lina noticed a discrepancy in her results, one of her subjects was listed down as 90 instead of 83 as in the test papers.

We recalled the instant recently where we thought she was 27th but because of fourteen marks, she was actually 10th.

Now, when she was told about that, she was adamant not to tell her teacher as she was afraid that she might slide down the ranking. Of course she would, but there’s no other way about it. It was the only thing to do. But what surprised us was that she took it badly, that she is not third after all. All the coaxing about honesty, what she does not deserved, what is not hers to keep simply would not work.

“Tak boleh Adik….., kalau nanti besok orang dapat tahu, lagi tak elok. Dah lah bukan nombor tiga, tak honest pulak….”

Nothing we said would solace her. She had to tell the teacher the next day, there are no two ways about it. There is a God after all, she was seventh instead of third, so that wasn’t so bad. And we found out why she was very reluctant to give up those seven marks – she had boasted to a classmate who, is not in the list of her favorite people, (the classmate was ninth in class) about beating her this time and was terrified should those seven marks made her placed lower than the other girl.

“Ha, jangan buat macam tu lagi. Dapat nombor satu ke, tiga ke, tujuh ke, bukan untuk lagak dengan orang”, I said.

“This time you got away with it, imagine kalau you actually fell behind her in class?”, I added.

“Budak tu selalu lagak, Adik nak kenakan dia pulak….”

“Adik, that is her problem. Don’t make it yours. In life, you will meet people like that. Lagi teruk dari tu pun ada tau? The only sensible thing to do is to try not to be like them.”

Ya, easier said than done. I see no halo above me…

“At least you deserved the nombor tujuh….”

“Nombor tujuh tak dapat hadiah.”

”Sofia, the hadiah is knowing that you are seventh and if you work a little bit harder and not be so gopoh in your work, you’ll find out that you could be third, second or even first!!!”

Do you buy that? The only reason I do is because I said it!!!

“For heaven’s sake, I’ll buy you a hadiah, I’ll buy you ten hadiahs!!”

“Ten? Ten?”

“Maybe one, OK?”

“Ten lah…”

“Kalau ten pengsan lah Papa, tauke balak pun pengsan..“

”Heh heh........., apalah Papa ni. Oklah, one hadiah, tapi yang besar tau?”

Adoi, pengsan jugak jadi bapak ni rupanya.

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Hong Kong Phooeey Part 2...

2006-11-16T17:30:00.000+08:00

My boss, hungry after a night of hectic shopping!!!

The nightly light show at Hong Kong harbor, viewed from Kowloon.

My boss looking at some very interesting literature...

Nightly light show, Avenue of Stars building, Kowloon...

More nightly light show....

More nightly light show, with a pair of lovebirds to boot....

Hong Kong Phooeey

2006-11-13T17:27:00.000+08:00

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Aaaah……, been away a bit.

Hong Kong is nice. Nice and clean. I was expecting a place full of full-throated spits all around but there were no such thing and I can say that it is cleaner than KL. The people line up for the buses. The drivers are more considerate of other roadusers than the ones at home.

Did some shopping for the family at Temple Market, Ladies Market and Stanley Market. I turned blue on the way to Stanley Market, due to the winding road. My friend was thrilled to see me turn blue but then I told him that unless he likes the smell of puke, he’d better ask Michael Schumacher who was driving the taxi to slow down. Happiness is getting a little something for the family. And myself too. Ever seen a gun that can store twelve and fire twelve, yes, twelve rubber bands? The cats around the neighborhood better behave. The view of Hong Kong skyline from Kowloon is simply breath taking, only to be surpassed by the view of Hong Kong from Victoria's Peak. Then there was Repulse Bay. Credit must be given to the Brits for choosing that place, selling opium from it and making it what it is right now. Transportation was a cinch. You have the buses, the trains and the ferries. The taxis are a bit pricey but if there are two or better still three of you, the taxis are always better. The people are not as kiasu as I thought they’d be. They are always helpful, though some simply speak very little English, ha ha.

“You speak English?”

The answer came out “No more”. I think she wanted to say “Not much” but something else came out.

Then there was “No your shenality?”

“My what?!!”

“No your shenality?”*

Oh, oh, my shenality. I’m a Malaysian……”

I must have walked a million miles while I was there. Good thing the weather was a bit cooler than home and a lot less humid, so it helped people like like me, who sweats a lot!!!

Food was OK, like other foreign cities, it takes a bit of legwork to find halal food. When I am tired of Pakistani food at the Chungking Mansion, we could always go to this one halal Singaporean restaurant.

Hong Kong is nice.

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Boids and the Bees

2006-10-16T08:36:00.000+08:00

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No, the photo up there is not of my girlfriends or mistresses. I wish!!! Just that I could not download (muat turun? Is there such a word?) the photo I wanted I had to settle for Eira (at least that was the title of the photo so I reckoned one of them is Eira) and her friend.

The first person who correctly told me about the birds and the bees was my friend Tiri. I was about ten or eleven at that time. Until then, the teachings of another friend, Ariffin, held water. From Ariffin I learned that babies came into this world through their mothers' navel.

Oh, Tiri is still single. Ariffin went to join the merchant marine. Don't know if he ever got married and had any children. I will just assume that Tiri did not father any children, based on the fact that he never married. We have to follow some sort of convention here.

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God Free My Pipe

2006-10-13T12:06:00.000+08:00

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Yes, God free my pipe.

I haven't been on the rig floor in about six or seven years... When in trouble, get help from any and all quarters. The flowers on the drill pipe might help lubricate it...

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Britney

2006-10-10T12:58:00.000+08:00

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Here's a blurry photo of Britney, the resident cat at Lina's parents' house. The thing is, she does not even belong to Lina's parents but to a neighbour. But she never fails to come when I call her over. She likes running her teeth over my toes, fingers, hands, feet, any part of the body that she could get hold of.

Britney? Yup, Britney. Leha was the first one, the other one. Why Britney? After Leha, let's give this one a glamorous name.

Just call her Nini....

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Life in the Fasting Lane - The Upteenth Part

2006-10-09T16:03:00.000+08:00

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Fasting month is back again. Sing it to the tune of Happy Days….

I am sure I have mentioned this before but I am not orang yang paling kuat puasa dalam dunia. Ada apaa sikit aje, adeh, lotih.……

Sofia seemed to follow me a bit. Over the years she had asked to buka at 9 am, 10 am, 12 noon, 1 pm, 2 pm, 4 pm and 7 pm. 7 pm pun ada???? Bertuah punya anak….

My earliest memories of fasting must have been when I was about seven years old. Emak was baking some kuih Hari Raya and my brother Sharaff was about ten months old or so, for he just started knowing how to walk. There was my mother taking the kuihs out of the oven and putting them into those milk tins. She asked me to give some to my brother and I took one of them tins and started feeding him them kuihs, one at a time. Somehow in between feeding him, I took a few myself and I think it was after the fourth or fifth piece of kuih did I realized that I was fasting. You’d think that I did that on purpose but kuih Raya makes you thirsty!!! I tell you, I’d rather ter-accident terminum air dari termakan kuih raya…. Not guilty.

The next time, if anyone ter-accident anything, you can bet that it is cold, red (siraplah tu!!) and lots of it!!!!

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Finally Letting Go

2006-09-15T16:32:00.000+08:00

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We sent Nazzim off to a boarding school on Monday, 11 September 2006. To my alma mater. Yes, that school. The school that causes Lina to make faces every time I mention Its name.

When he was first told of the news, he was undecided. He was disappointed earlier this year when he failed to get a place in my old school but as they say, time is a great healer. He’s pretty much forgotten about it. Until I broached the subject early last week. The problem was that he was already comfortable with the old school. He has his own set of friends, busy with taekwondo etc. but he thought about it overnight, came back the next morning and told Lina and me that he wants to go.

It was hard for me to let go. Just after telling him that he got a place, I felt like telling him to forget about the whole thing and just continue going to the school that he has been going to these nine months. Lina laughed, she thought that she was the only one reconsidering the decision for she could not sleep very well for a few nights before he left.

So for the last few days in his previous schools, he has been going collecting documents, saying goodbye to his teachers and friends. His teachers were happy that he got what he wanted but there was one who was puzzled on how come he got an offer that late in the year. Simple.

- have someone who knows that there are vacancies in that school.
- have someone who is willing to do the legwork for you.

And my friend did that without asking me first, only telling me when the offer was nearly out. Could one ask for a better friend? I think not.

Nazzim’s friends were sad that he was leaving them. One said “No!!” when he broke the news to him. One girl sadly asked Nazzim, “Who is going to teach me mathematics?” I thought that was sweet. I didn’t know I had a mathematician as a son. That girl is cute but according to Nazzim, “She is just a friend lah Papa!!!” A few gave him money, yes, money!!! I think three or four of his friends gave him RM 1 each!! I think it is a tradition that I somehow don’t know about. Even his maths pupil gave him RM 1.

Sofia professes that she does not miss him. Yeah, sure. I am sure she misses the banter and skirmishes that they have every night, while doing their homework. Well, I do. Lina does. But we’ll visit him every weekend and he gets to come home the first and third weekend of every month. And if he complains about food, we’ll just rush something to him, something that he likes. Yes, we’ll spoil him but it’s OK, Section 7 (a) of the Parent Manual says we could do that sometimes. Looking to the future, I am looking forward to going to school reunions with him. That would be fun. He’s phoned me three times so far. Once to tell me to ask my friend, whose son also joined the school at the same time, to send his son back to school quickly after lunch the day they registered, for he was lonely. Then it was for me to bring more baju Melayu, more underpants and some instant noodles. And finally because he was undecided on which outfit to join for the uniformed society. Lina was a bit worried when his calls were far and few in between. I am not, for that is an indication that nothing is wrong!!!

A pleasant surprise, there was a banner at the school gate, from Kementerian Pelajaran, congratulating the school as it was chosen as “SBP Terbaik Keseluruhan 2005”. To be chosen as such out of 50 or so SBP’s, that’s really something. I think he’s in good hands, I mean, a good school.

Well, finally, goodbye little boy. Hello young man….

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An Old Feel Good Tale

2006-08-28T20:03:00.000+08:00

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I have heard this tale so many times in my life. Here is how it goes....

My mother went to a neighbour's house and she noticed that there was a bountiful harvest of fruits on the pangkin.

"Cik Ani, mana dapat buah banyak-banyak ni?"

"Alah, Cik Bada, si Meli bawak balik tadi, dia ambik kat atas bukit tu. Dia kata dia pegi dengan Usop. Usop tak ada bawak balik sikit?"

"Tak ada pun..."

"Eh, banyak buah atas bukit tu, saya ingat mesti si Usop ada bawak balik sikit kat Cik Bada?"

"Tak ada...."

When she returned home, she asked my brother, who was maybe twelve or thirteen years old then. For I must be two or three years old, for I don't remember a thing about it.

"Usop, Mak nampak banyak buah kat rumah Cik Ani tadi. Dia kata Meli dengan engkau pegi ambik? Apa tak bawa balik rumah sikit?"

"Alaaaaa Mak, buah curi biar saya sorang aje makan, Mak dengan adik2 saya tak payahlah makan....."

Heh heh heh, come to think of it, it is so true. Pandai jugak my brother tu, benda tak baik dia tak bawak balik rumah sumbat kat adik-adik.

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Me, An All Black

2006-08-18T14:33:00.000+08:00

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Earlier this year when the All Blacks was playing one of the home teams in their tour of the U.K., Lina said, “Pa, you look like that player over there, there……, that one.”

“Which one?”, I asked.

“There, the one wearing the number 7 jersey…”

The All Blacks in the number 7 jersey? That’s……. Richie McCaw!!

I look like Richie McCaw? Me? Look like Richie McCaw? Richie McCaw? Yeah, Richie McCaw, only the captain and only one of the best All Blacks players currently.

Be still my foolish heart.

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Daytime Enemies and Nighttime Enemies

2006-08-12T23:03:00.000+08:00

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Quite different from daytime friends and nighttime lovers, ain't it?

Have you ever let someone's existence bother you? I usually don't but sometimes when my path and judas' path crosses, I'd like very much to kick him off the topmost floor of the tallest building in the world. As something similar to what Kelly Clarkson might say, because of you, I hold strongly to the saying that revenge is a dish best tasted cold. Hmmmm, not that catchy lah...

In the recent tournament where I played Tiger Woods (read, I won) I was supposed to be in the same flight as mrs. judas. I fear for her safety, for I have, fourteen clubs, read my lips, fourteen clubs, the maximum as allowed by the USGA and The Royal and Ancient St. Andrews Golf Club, within easy reach that I might use to bash her head.

"Azman (the organiser) , please put me in another flight, a different flight from mrs. bunga tahi ayam..."

He laughed and before he could say anything else, I continued, "I'll tell you why if you have a few hours, long story, no abridged or Reader's Digest version available...." Good thing he didn't have 3 hours. And the rest is history.

I have good reasons to dislike him. Dia punya mulut sikit punya bisa. He's got a mouth that is lethal. For starters, I was working in his home state and in front of me, he mused with another local guy on why are people from somewhere else are going there to work? Don't they have work in their own states? They come to our state to steal our resources. There are more, maybe I'll tell, maybe I won't. Maybe I should, then I might get some opinion on what I should do. Maybe I should, there's one funny story that involved him and his sidekick. Now, that's a funny story. I smile whenever I think of that story.

I have kept that for 16 years and when I have my dish, it will be frozen solid. The way someone puts it, "Imagine that they have amputated your arms, amputated your legs and gouged out your eyes, with only your hearing left. Then they say that next, they will go for the dearest things in your life. You are so helpless that you can never ever do anything about it, not today, not tomorrow, not ever."

Weeeii, macam Twilight Zone weeeiii......!!! Even I'm scared.

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Letting Go

2006-07-28T17:29:00.000+08:00

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This morning, Nazzim went on a school camping trip to Melaka. That’s a first. There was no way we could say no. We wanted to but we couldn’t, we have to start letting go. He has been very excited about it and it seemed that places for the trip were limited, the cute girl sitting in front of him in class couldn’t get a place. Heh, heh, I have been kidding him about her these few weeks. This last week, it has been six more days before I go camping, three more days, two more days etc. etc. etc. And it's been a case of going through his list of things to bring and making sure that he has everything that he might need.

He managed to get a place by virtue of being in the taekwondo club. That there son of mine is a red-belted taekwondo exponent. One notch blow red and black and when he is sixteen, he could go for the full-fledged genuine 24-carat black belt.

“Kalau black belt, tali pinggang ada nama nanti…”

“By all means, get your black belt and get your name embossed, burnt or engraved on it”, I’d say, “And I’ll pay for it!!!”.

As if I have been doing otherwise…..

And now Sofia is on our case.

“Adik nak pergi dulu Mama and Papa tak kasi….”

“Adik……., Adik kecik lagi, nanti bila dah besar nanti, pergilah…”

“Bila?”

“Nantilah, bila dah besar nanti….”

In my heart, “When you are 35....”

We can’t wait for Sunday when he comes back…..

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